The Things We Do
by LLF
Summary: Abby and Luka...a Christmas eve announcement and beyond. Written after Abby announces that she is pregnant All About Christmas Eve - season 12 and the show went on hiatus.....for THREE WEEKS!
1. Abby's News

Abby stared at Luka and caught the sheepish smile forming at the corners of his lips.

'What?" he asked slowly.

"I said, I'm pregnant,' she repeated.

'Okay", Luka replied. Abby groaned and turned away from him.

'Is that all you have to say?" she cried.

"What do you want me to say?" he asked softly. Abby felt his hands on her shoulders and he turned her gently around to face him.

'Do you want me to say that I am...stunned? That I am... surprised?" he said as he carressed her jaw line with his thumb. He studied her face and then kissed her gently. "How about I say that I am very, very happy for us?" Abby melted against his kiss for an instant and then stiffened. She pulled away from him.

'We can't do this, Luka," she said. "What are we going to do with a baby? You've just taken a new position at the hospital and I'm still..." Luka took her hand and pressed a kiss into her palm.

"We do what everyone else should do with a baby," he said. "We will keep it warm and dry...feed it when it is hungry...and love it." A broad smile spread across his face. "We solve all the problems together, eh?" Abby sighed as she studied his face. She raised her hands to his chest and sighed.

"I am not saying that I am going to go through with this yet," she said determindedly. 'It's still early enough." Luka raised his eyebrows and nodded. "Okay," he said again. "We will talk about it...in the morning.' He snuggled her under his arm and grinned broadly as they walked across the street to a cab stand. When they reached the other side he could contain himself no longer. He swept her off her feet and into his arms and twirled around and around as the snow flakes drifted down on them in the night.

She came awake slowly and stretched a bit in the warm bed covers. She opened her eyes and found Luka propped up on one arm and watching her.

"You are watching me again..." she sighed. He grinned.

"You are beautiful when you sleep," he said.

'Uh...yeah...well...I remember a time when you said I was nothing special...not pretty enough,' she said. Luka frowned for a second as he thought.

"Ah...' he sighed softly as he remembered. "I said that when I needed to get you off your cuff and back into medical school."

'My 'duff', you mean," she said. "Not cuff...duff...and it was mean." His eyes twinkled as he slipped his hand to her almost flat belly under the covers and caressed the skin there. Her eyes met his and he smiled.

"So...do you want the dill pickles with your breakfast yet?" he asked. A sudden wave of nausea swept through her.

"Oh great..." she said as she threw the covers off and raced for the bathroom. Luka fell back against the pillows and grinned. He would help her in a moment but right now he was enjoying the fact that his baby...his wonderful and very smart baby...was already making it's presence known.


	2. They Know

Haleh sat across the table from Abby and watched her carefully as she absently flipped the pages of the magazine in front of her. Chuny and Dori were ensconced on the couch and pretending to be reading themselves. Abby was aware that they were watching her and tried hard to ignore it. She sighed softly and went back to work on the stack of charts she was writing in. Chuny, Haleh and Dori exchanged glances and then went back to their own activities. The silence loomed large in the lounge. Abby dropped her pen in frustration.

"What!" she asked sharply. 'What is it?'

"Well...someone is certainly touchy today", Haleh said with a feigned frown. Chuny smiled.

"Touchy as in, maybe...emotional?" she replied. Haleh chuckled and stood up to carry a coffee cup to the counter.

"So, Dori," Haleh asked. "Did you ever find that missing test kit from the O.B. closet?" The three nurses looked pointedly at Abby. "Uh...I bought mine at the mini mart like everyone else," Abby said. Dori moved to sit in a chair at the table with Chuny right behind.

"So you did take a test," she said.

"And...?" Chuny asked. Abby glanced from one to the other.

"Wouldn't that be confidential information?" she asked. Chuny leaped up and did a high five slap with Haleh.

" I knew it!" she laughed.

"I can't wait to tell Carol!" Haleh laughed.

"We are not telling anyone!" Abby cried futilely.

"Of course..." Dori nodded, her eyes wide. "We won't tell...promise."

'Do you think it's possible to have a private life around here?" Abby groaned. The three nurses stopped on their way out the door and contemplated her question.

"No," Haleh said.

"Nope," Chuny grinned.

"I don't think so," Dori added. Abby groaned and buried her face in her hands as they left. She sat back in her chair and sighed heavily.

This was all so new...and scary. Luka was being wonderful...so patient. She was used to handling things. She had seen herself through some major curve balls in her life. But for the very first time she missed having someone to talk to. She missed Susan...and lord help her...she actually missed Maggie. There was only so much you could say on the telephone. The door of the lounge opened and Sam walked in.

"Hey," she said and headed for the refrigerator. 'Kinda quiet out there."

"We both know it's just the lull before the weekend storm," Abby replied. Sam opened a bottle of water and sat down at the table.

"How are you doing?" she asked. Abby shrugged.

"Trying to keep up with this ever growing pile of paperwork," she said.

"Luka told me about the baby, Abby," Sam said. "I am very happy for the two of you. I know that he has wanted this for a while." She sighed.

"And I know that he has especially wanted it with you," she finished. Abby looked at her and Sam smiled. She lifted the bottle in a toast.

"Luka is a great dad," Sam said. "Just ask Alex." Abby chuckled.

"He is one scary kid," Abby said. "And too smart for his own good." Sam grinned.

"Look at all you have to look forward to!" she said as she stood up. "Thanks for having him for dinner the other night while I was on duty."

"I was glad he was there," Abby said. "Luka had someone to play his games with." Sam laughed as she left. Abby went back to work on her files and was gathering them up as Luka pushed open the door to the lounge.

"Would you have any idea why all the nurses are smiling at me?" he asked. Abby chuckled and stood up with the arm load of files.

"Gee...I don't know," she said. "That Croatian charm maybe?" Luka grinned and studied her quizzically for a moment.

"They know," he said. "They know about the baby. I thought you wanted to keep it a secret?"

"I did!" Abby cried. "I don't know how they found out." She glared playfully at him. "And don't give me that crap about...glowing". Luka shrugged and held the door open for her.

"But you are glowing," he said as he pressed a kiss to her forehead. "My meeting is over and I am going home. Come to my place for dinner?"

"I don't know," Abby said warily. "When I am with you at your place, I never make it home to mine. I need some rest." Luka chuckled.

"Tonight we sleep...I promise," he said. "I'll even give you a Croatian massage to relax you."

"Right," she said. "I think that's how we got into this situation in the first place." Luka laughed heartedly and headed out the door to the E.R. bay.

"That is one happy man," Haleh said with a satisfied smile as she watched him disappear. "And when the boss is happy, we are all happy."

"So when do we start the baby pool?' Chuny asked as she leaned over the older woman's shoulder.

"I think we'd better start the wedding pool first," Haleh nodded.

"I heard that," Abby said as she passed by them to put her files away. "Private life, remember? Confidentiality?" Haleh and Chuny snickered.


	3. An Old Friend

"Ouch...that's a nasty cut, Carly", Abby said as carefully observed the open laceration on the girl's index finger.

"My Mom made me wash the dishes," the 13 year old said. 'I was washing a glass and it just popped in my hand."

" Well, it's a little deep. I think we are going to have to take a couple of stitches to help it close properly," Abby said as she pulled a rolling tray table between the girl and herself. 'Dori, can you get me a suture kit, please?" Abby looked up at the girl's white face and deep blue eyes. She smiled and her brown eyes twinkled.

"Looks like you will have to take a few days off from doing dishes," she said. Dori returned with a suture kit and placed it on the table.

"She'll just find something else for me to do instead," Carly shrugged. "Do I have to watch?"

'Oh no, sweetie" Abby said, "Dori is just going to wash the cut out and numb it a little bit. I'll be right back and you can just lay back and close your eyes." Abby jotted a note on the girl's chart.

"Dori, give it a wash with chlorhexidine gluconate and then I'll order some lidocaine," she said. " I need to check on a patient in in exam 3 and I will be right back." She smiled at Carly and patted her knee.

"Then I am going to have a talk with your Mom about resting that hand for a few days," she said.

"You can try ," Carly sighed. Abby laughed and made her way through the Suture Room doors. Carly's mother was in a chair in the hall filling out insurance paperwork. She looked up with a worried frown.

"A couple of stitches," Abby said. "She'll be fine. The glass missed the tendons."

"Carly is a harpist," her mother said. "She needs those fingers. Thank you, Dr. Lockhart."

"I'm going to give the lidocaine a chance to set in and I will be right back to suture the cut," she replied. "You can go in and wait with her. I think she is a little nervous." Carly's mother nodded. Abby turned and headed toward the exam room area. She pressed a hand to the small of her back and sighed. It had been a long, long shift. It seemed like she had seen every small cut and laceration in Chicago. Oh, and there was the sprained ankle she treated at noon. And the runner with leg cramps. It had been a strange day. She felt as if some unknown force were picking and choosing her patients for her.

"Abby, I need your help in here", Luka called as she passed an open door. Abby grimaced as she caught the blood curdling screams coming from the bed. Luka was holding a writhing little boy in place while his very young mother watched from a corner.

"Hold him!" Luka ordered and Abby moved to the other side of the bed to help restrain the child in place.

"This is Bailey Miller," Luka said over the screams. 'He is five years old and was brought in with minor epistaxis, very bad breath and pain in his nasal cavity. I scoped him and there is an obstruction. I put five drops of Otrivin in his nose...which he did not like." Abby chuckled. Obviously. Luka winked at her and then suddenly let go of the boy. Bailey stopped moving immediately and looked at Luka. With a flourish, Luka pulled something invisible out of thin air. The little boy watched as Luka pantomimed caressing a feather. He stuck it jauntily behind his ear and Bailey chuckled. Luka tossed the invisible feather into the air and pretended to blow it to keep it from falling. He gestured to Bailey and the little boy smiled and blew lightly at the invisible feather. Abby gently released her hands and watched their play. Luka blew the 'feather' at her and she whisked it back into the air over Bailey. Bailey blew harder. Luka reached over and held one of the child's nostrils closed as Bailey blew.

"Again, Bailey," Luka said. "Get it higher!" Chuny hurried into the room and handed Luka a pair of bayonet forceps. Luka quickly grasped the tiniest corner of something in the boy's nose and pulled a tightly wadded mass from the nostril. It was bloody and mucousy and Luka laid it on the instrument table. Chuny busied herself wiping Bailey's nose while the rest of them leaned over the table. Luka carefully began to unfold the piece of paper that was the mess.

"Bailey...you little freak!" his mother cried. 'That's my missing child support check!"

"Daddy told me not to lose it!" Bailey began to cry. Luka exchanged laughing glances with Abby and examined the boy's nose. Dori came to the door.

"Dr. Lockhart," she said. "Carly is ready." Luka nodded and Abby walked to the door.

"Chuny, I never made it to exam 3..." She said.

"Dr. Morris is there," Chuny said. "It's the kid with the rash, right?"

"Morris..." Abby mouthed as she shook her head.

A half an hour later Carly was stitched up and bandaged and released to her mother's care. She was smiling broadly as Abby outlined that she was not to get the finger wet for at least 48 hours and should have limited use of it for the rest of the week. Abby finished her chart at the desk and then picked up another file. She arched her back again and sighed.

"Tough day?" Chuny asked. Abby shook her head.

" Not really," she said. "Stitches and stitches and stitches...a sprained ankle...running cramps and more stitches. I'd like a little more variety, I think."

"Dr. Kovac asked us to keep you out of curtains," Chuny said. "We have had three cases of chicken pox and one roseola all from the same daycare. Dr. Morris is with a possible measles right now."

"Dr. Morris has been handling all of the rashes today," Frank said from the computer station. "A regular kamikaze of infectious diseases." Chuny chuckled and nodded.

"Maybe he will catch something fun!" she said. Abby frowned at her in disbelief.

"Oh, Chuny," she said shaking her head. "Someone needs to talk to Sam about you and Haleh working the same shift. You two are SO bad together."

"Wouldn't do any good," Chuny grinned. "We have something called 'seniority'...which YOU gave up to become the kick ass doc that you are!"

"Excuse me," said someone at the desk. "I'm looking for Dr. Kovac? Dr. Luka Kovac?" Abby and Chuny turned to see a woman standing at the desk. She was looking around and smiled broadly when she saw Luka approaching.

"Luka!" she called and ran to him.

"Gillian?" he said. Gillian ran to him and threw herself into his arms. Luka was stunned as she reached up and kissed him soundly. Frank's mouth dropped open.

"Gillian?" Chuny asked, not taking her eyes off the scene.

"From Montreal..." Abby said watching them. "Oh...and Kisagani...in Africa." Abby sighed.

"That's my guy," she said. "A girl in every port!"


	4. Gillian

Gillian began to speak softly to Luka and with a quick glance at Abby he swept his friend into the lounge and quickly shut the door. Chuny nudged Abby's elbow with her own.

"So, how close were they in Africa?" she asked.

"Pretty close..." Abby replied. "Luka calls her his 'good friend.' She brought him back to the states after Carter found him in the refugee camp."

"I remember now!" Chuny said. "I thought I'd seen her with him before." Kerry Weaver strolled up the desk with clipboards in hand.

"There are patients waiting in chairs people," she said. "Let's get them out of here." She handed three of the clipboards to Abby.

"I just got a call about one of your cases, Abby," she said, 'It was from the very grateful manager of the Chicago Symphony. She wanted to know if it would unethical to present you with tickets to a concert series. You stitched up the finger of Carlotta Mendoza today? Good job on the patient satisfaction.."

"Carly?" Abby was flabbergasted. 'She is just a kid."

"And a prodigy," Kerry added. "I have seen her perform. She is quite an amazing talent. Now let's clear the board for the afternoon shift." Abby nodded and eyed the closed door of the lounge.

She was busy with a patient when Luka left. He came to the window and waved, indicating that he would call her. But that had been hours ago. She was snuggled into a chair in her apartment catching up on some reading. It was hard to concentrate on the journal in her lap. The tea kettle whistled and she got up to pour the hot water into a cup. The telephone rang.

"Luka?" she said as picked up the phone.

" No, Abby," came the voice at the other end. Abby smiled happily. "Susan!" she exclaimed. "I am so glad you called. How are you?"

"Wonderful," Susan sighed. "I love LOVE Iowa...but you've heard me say that before. Chuck and I signed papers today for a house! Can you believe it? It has a huge backyard for Cosmos to play in and I think we are even getting a dog." Abby chuckled. A lump grew in her throat as she realized how much she missed her friend's daily presence.

"How about you?" Susan asked. "How are you feeling? Any morning sickness yet?"

"Oh, here and there," Abby sighed and settled back into her chair. "I saved the Chicago Symphony Orchestra today." Susan laughed.

"How is Luka?" she asked. The lump in Abby's throat tightened.

"I'm not sure," she said. 'Gillian's back."

"Gillian?" Susan repeated.

"Remember that nurse from Montreal that brought him back from Africa when he was so sick?" Abby reminded her. "Long hair? Long legs? Gorgeous body?"

"Oh yeah," Susan said. "I remember. We all took a vow to hate her." Abby chuckled and then wiped a tear from her eye. She was silent.

"Don't do this to yourself, Abby" Susan said quietly. "You are sitting there imagining all kinds of things that are not happening. Luka loves you and he always has. For a long time...you know that. He would not screw this up again!" Abby sighed deeply.

"He hasn't answered his pager or his phone," she said.

"Oh, you know him," Susan said. "He probably took her out to dinner and they're sitting in a bar somewhere. He never could tell time...would always come and go when he pleased. I think he keeps his watch on Croatian time actually." Abby laughed again.

"I miss you, Susan," she said.

"Well, I am only a phone call away, kiddo." she said. "Now, get up out off your couch and make yourself some soup. You are eating for two now, you know."

"How did you know I haven't eaten yet," Abby asked her.

"Because I have lived your life, Abby," Susan laughed. "I'll talk you again soon. And I'll send pictures of the house to Luka's email."

"I'd like that," Abby said. "And Susan...thank you."

"Any time you need me, sweetie, just call," Susan said before hanging up. Abby set the telephone in it's recharger cradle and sighed. Susan was right. She was eating for two. It wasn't going to help either of them if she didn't take care of herself. She busied herself in the kitchen and opened a can of spaghetti rings. There wasn't much else in the cupboard. She'd eaten with Luka so often lately that she hadn't really noticed that her own larder was empty. She was stirring the spaghetti in a pot on the stove when the telephone rang again. This time it was Luka.

"Hey, you should see me now," she told him. "I'm cooking!" Luka chuckled on the other end and then there was silence.

"Is everything okay?" Abby asked as she scraped the spaghetti from the pan into a bowl on the counter.

"Gillian is here, Abby," Luka said. "At my apartment. I need to stay with her tonight." Abby's heart fell.

"I see," she said quietly. "Well, that's fine. Whatever you need to do. But can I ask why?"

"It's not for me to say," he said. They were both silent.

"Are you on the schedule for tomorrow?" he asked finally.

"No...actually I have the entire day off," she said. "I am not on again until Friday night. I promised Neela I would help her apartment shop...again."

"Well, we have some things we need to do tomorrow so I guess I will call you when we are home again," he said. "Good night, Abby"

"Luka..." she said softly. She heard him breathing on the other end of the line.

"I saved the Chicago Symphony Orchestra today." She smiled as she heard his soft chuckle on the other end of the line.

"Good night, Abby," he said again. She smiled a little and put the telephone away.


	5. Choices

Luka was waiting in the ambulance bay when Abby hurried toward the E.R. to report for work on Friday. He tossed her a gown.

"Carbon monoxide poisoning," he said. "Seven family members. ETA is less than a minute." Abby nodded, removed her jacket and pulled the gown over her scrubs. Their eyes met for a brief second as Chuny fastened the gown and shoved Abby's jacket under the gurney. A hint of a smile crossed Luka's face just for her. Then an ambulance careened into the bay, followed by a second one.

"What's the story?" Luka called over the sirens as the ambulance doors plunged open.

"It's a bad one. A kerosene heater caught a family at the dinner table. We have one DOA. Six others on 100 oxygen push." the paramedic said as the crew pulled out two stretchers from the back of each ambulance. The E.R. team kicked into gear as each patient was transferred to a waiting gurney and pushed to an expectant exam room.

Abby did a rapid visual exam of her patient. She was elderly, Asian, approximately 120 pounds and breathing hard and fast with the oxygen mask. Her hands were clutching the worn house dress over her chest.

"'Hurts..." she was muttering as she tossed from side to side.

"Ma'am, do you know where you are?" Abby asked as she used her stethoscope. Sam looked up and gave her a blood pressure reading. She began to hook the heart monitor to the woman and the rapid beeping of the machine filled the room.

"Hurts..." the woman moaned again.

"What's your name?" Sam asked her gently. The woman's eyes opened and she looked from Sam to Abby.

"Lily..." she gasped.

"Lily, I know that your chest hurts and we're going to find out why," Abby said quietly as she leaned close to the woman. "You need to be calm and breathe as slowly and as deeply as you can through the mask. Can you do that for me please?" Lily nodded slowly. She grabbed at Sam's hand.

"Family?" she asked.

"They're being taken care of ," Sam said and pointed into the next exam room where Neela and Chuny were working on a little girl. "See? You are lucky they brought you to County. We're the best at this sort of thing." The woman nodded and relaxed. She closed her eyes and began to breathe slowly and deeply. The heart monitor's beeps slowed as well. Abby grinned at Sam and gave her a thumbs up sign.

Ray and Morris were not so lucky. There were just four surviving family members to transfer to medical beds. Nearly half of the family was wiped out by simple carbon monoxide poisoning. The loss of so many lives so quickly put a pallor on the departing shift as they left for the day. The rest of the evening was busy with the usual Friday night patient traffic. Abby wasn't aware that Luka was still there until she found him sleeping on the couch in the lounge.

She knelt next to him and smiled. Who was watching who for a change? She leaned over and pressed a light kiss to his cheek. Luka's dark eyes flew open. He saw her and smiled. His arm snaked around her waist and he brought her closer for another kiss.

"I've missed you," she said quietly when they separated. He nodded and turned on his side to face her. Abby glanced down at his long legs curled to fit on the vinyl covered sofa.

"Your bed at home is not comfortable enough?" she asked. Luka shrugged.

"I wanted to talk to you before I left," he said quietly.

"Well, I'm here," she said. "So...talk." Luka looked at her a second and chuckled. He sat up on the couch and gently pulled her next to him. He laced the fingers of one hand with her's and sighed. Abby watched his face expectantly.

"Well?" she said. Luka took a deep breath.

"I have asked Kerry for some time off," he said. "I need to go to Montreal with Gillian for a while." Abby's brown eyes widened a bit.

"Because?" she asked slowly.

"I can't say," Luka said. Abby pulled her hand from his slowly and stood up.

"Fine," she said and headed toward the door. "Does Kerry know the reason?" He shook his head.

"Abby," he pleaded as he stood up and caught her. He turned her around and smiled softly as he toyed with the strand of hair that had escaped her pony tail. She looked up at him.

"Soon I will be able to tell you," he said and put his hands on her shoulders. "Right now, I can't. But it's important."

"Of course!" she said as a fire began to burn in her eyes. "Go right a head and prance off to Montreal with your old...paramour! Who am I to stop you? I don't need any explanations. I never have." She pulled away from him.

"Send me a postcard this time," she added darkly. "Did I just say _paramour_? Geez..." Luka sighed heavily as the door closed behind her. What was he going to do?

Abby was looking at the information on the board and ignored Luka as he headed out the ambulance bay doors into he night. Sam eyed Abby's angry face and Luka's retreating form as she picked up the ringing telephone..

"Uh oh...trouble in paradise?" Frank asked.

"Shut up, Frank," Abby said sharply. She jerked a chart from the stand and headed toward the waiting area.


	6. Give Him To Me

Abby was folding her laundry when the apartment door bell rang.

She shoved the stack of towels aside and stood up.

"I'm coming!" she called as the bell rang again. She pulled open the door and her mouth dropped open.

"Gillian," she said. The woman on the other side of the door smiled slightly.

"Hello, Abby," she said. Abby stepped aside.

"Uh...please come on in," she said. "It's a bit of a mess right now..." She frowned and looked out in the hall before closing the door.

"It's...umm...sweet," Gillian said as she looked around. Abby hurriedly swept the clean laundry back into a basket and shoved it around to the end of the couch.

"Can I get you some...tea...or something?" Abby asked as she tugged at the very old MASH tee shirt she'd thrown on with her sweat pants. Gillian shook her head.

"I want you to give me Luka," she said firmly.

"I am sorry?" Abby replied. Gillian was silent and just looked at her.

"Luka is not mine to give...to anyone," Abby shrugged.

"Oh, but he is," Gillian said with a lilting French accent. "Much more than you know."

"The Luka that I knew from Kisagani never looked past tomorrow," she said slowly as she wandered to the curtained window and looked out onto the street. "Always ...only today. He never cared to know what was down the road before him until now." Gillian turned and her green eyes bore into Abby's brown ones. "And now, I need him."

"Well..." Abby smiled wryly. "Since I have only seen him once at the hospital and have had only two phone calls since you've arrived..." She put her hand on her hip.

"I think you have him," she finished firmly. Gillian chuckled.

"Be careful, Abby," she said as she traced a finger along the back of the couch. "Jealousy does not become you." Abby's face burned as she glared at the carefully groomed red head before her. Gillian stopped and picked up the book that sat on Abby's end table. It was one that Luka had brought to her. She smiled softly as she read the title and put it back down again.

"He will be yours for the rest of your life," she said. 'I am asking only for the next two months...the rest of my life." Gillian looked up at Abby's stricken face and chuckled.

"Ah...our Luka is still - and always - an honorable man..." she sighed. 'I see that he has not told you what I asked him not to after all. I don't need anyone's pity...especially yours." Gillian took a deep breath.

"There was a lump..." she continued. "And I was too busy to take care of it." She looked back at Abby.

"The tests that Luka made arrangements for here have only confirmed what the doctors in Africa told me, " she said. "My visa does not allow me to stay in Chicago if I can get comparable care in Canada. So..." She turned away. "We go to Montreal...to wait." Abby stood in stunned silence. Gillian turned to her.

"Yes...he is with me...and yet he is not with me," she said. "So, I must ask you to give him to me...please." Gillian headed toward the door and turned the knob. She looked back at Abby's back and smiled sadly.

"He is at the hospital clearing up some things before we go," she said. 'I imagine he will be there for some time." Abby heard the door close behind her. She took a deep, deep breath and let it out slowly. Her eyes narrowed and she reached for the jacket laying over a nearby chair. She threw it on and shoved her wallet deep into the pocket. She was frowning as she walked to the train station and found a seat on the El. She was fuming by the time she reached the hospital. She strode up to the ER admit desk.

"Abby!" Morris said happily. "Are you here to..."

"Where is Luka?" she interrupted him. Morris' face fell and he pointed down the hall with his pen. Abby turned and strode toward Luka's small office. Chuny stood up straight and watched Abby's back.

"Well...finally!" she said happily. "You GO, girl!" Morris looked over at her and frowned worriedly.

"You women are so scary..." he said. Chuny grinned and hissed like a cat as she bared her 'claws' at him. Morris whimpered and scampered out of her way away from the desk.

Luka looked up from his desk as the door to his office slammed open.

"Luka Kovac," Abby said sharply. "Damn you for not telling me what was going on!"

"Abby!" he said and stood up. Abby advanced toward him and punched him in the chest.

"For five days I have been patient and played the maligned and understanding girl friend...but no more! You should have told me!" She punched him again and again until Luka grabbed her hands. He twisted her arms around her chest and picked her up from behind. Abby kicked and twisted in his grasp.

"Stop it!" he said. "This is not the place...and besides I am getting very tuned in." Abby stopped writhing and then laughed frustration. Luka let her feet slide down to the floor and she turned around in his arms.

"Turned ON," shegroaned.

"That too..." Luka grinned. Abby looked up at him and laughed sheepishly. He wrapped his arms around her and held her close.

"Gillian came to see me," she said with her face pressed to his chest. Luka's arms tightened around her and he kissed the top of her head.

"You need to go," she sighed. "She brought you back to me once...and now, you need to go."

"So, it is okay with you?" he asked. Abby pulled back and looked up at him.

"No...it's NOT okay with me," she said, "but I understand." Luka sighed heavily and kissed the end of her nose. Abby looked up at him again.

"But this is the only time," she said. "I don't want any more of your...and shall I add...many...past relationships making a claim on you like this ever again." Luka laughed and nodded.

"I promise..." he said as he kissed her. Abby tucked her head under his chin and held him tightly.


	7. Phone Call

"What is it about February in Chicago?" Sam said as she shoved her down jacket into her locker. "It's so depressing!" She dropped into a chair and began to peel the heavy socks she wore off her feet. Abby looked up from the table where she sat with a quickly cooling bowl of soup in front of her. She stirred it with her spoon and then pushed it away.

"Not hungry?" Sam asked. Abby shook her head. She pressed a hand to her forehead.

"I must be coming down with something," she sighed. Sam scrutinized her friend's face.

"Got a nice couple of circles going there under your eyes," she said. Abby smiled and fluttered her eye lashes.

"Comes with the territory," she said. "I just pulled a double and it kept me pretty busy."

"A double... again!" Sam exclaimed. "For cripes sake, Abby. Would you please think about the rest of us? Luka is going to kill us if we let you make yourself sick." Abby chuckled.

"I am off in a couple of hours and I have three straight days free of this place for a change," she said. "I am planning a long bubble bath and, at least, an entire day in bed with the newspaper." Abby sighed and stood up. She picked up the soup and poured it into the trash. Sam watched her sadly as she rinsed out the bowl and set it in the sink.

"Have you heard from him?" Sam asked.

"We talk at night when he can catch me at home," Abby shrugged. "He misses me."

"He should be here," Sam shook her head and checked the contents of her scrub pocket.

"His friend is dying. What was I going to say?" Abby frowned.

"Uh...No? Um...don't go?" Sam said.

"I'm more mature than that," Abby said as she shook her head.

"Well, there's maturity and there's ...maturity," Sam said. Abby opened the lounge door. She stuck her tongue out at Sam.

"Oh...and that was real mature," Sam chuckled. She followed Abby out in to the hallway and bumped into a gurney that was parked by the door.

"What is this?" Sam called. Malik shrugged as he walked by.

"They are pounding us here," he said. "Have to put them somewhere." Sam checked the clipboard that lay on the foot of the rolling bed. She looked up at the patient sleeping in the middle of the ER hubbub.

"Guess you gotta sleep it off before you're gone." she sighed and shook her head. She saw Abby pushing another gurney into an exam room and hurried to help her with the patient.

"Asthma attack," Abby said. "Let's get him on a nebulizer treatment right away." Sam nodded and left for the medication. Abby smiled at the boy on the bed and patted his hand.

"I'm Dr. Lockhart, Dan. We're getting you some meds. Have you used Albuterol before?" she said to the college aged student before her. He nodded vigorously. "You said you lost your inhaler?" The boy nodded and pressed the oxygen mask tighter over his mouth and nose. He was wheezing and sucking in his stomach as he struggled to breathe.

"Party..." he managed to say. "Dogs...and cats...I didn't know. I thought I could handle it." Abby nodded and listened to his chest with the stethoscope. Sam hurried in and set up the neubulizer. She handed a small box to Abby,

"I think...I scared...my...friends...," he wheezed. "My girl...will... probably be...afraid to kiss...me ...ever...again."

"She called 911 so they did the right thing," Abby assured her. She opened the box and handed him an inhaler. Dan took a deep breath and then pulled the oxygen mask away long enough to use the inhaler. Abby waited for a moment and then smiled.

"Is there someone fro the college we should call? Your parents?" she asked. He nodded and pulled out the medical alert tag from a chain around his neck. Abby took the chain and smiled.

"I'm going to give this to someone at the desk so they can contact them," she said. 'I'll be right back." Sam nodded and helped switch the breathing masks he was using.

"I bet this hasn't happened to you in a while, hasn't it?" she asked. Dan shook his head. "It's easy to forget how careful you have to be."

The desk was a mad house of activity so Abby found a free phone and dialed the number on the medical alert tag. She spoke to someone who told her that Dan's parents were already on their way to the hospital. She was writing a short summary in his file when Jerry held up a phone.

"Abby," he said. "Call for you on line four. McGill Medical Center in Montreal." Chuny looked up and met Abby's eyes as she punched the numbers on the telephone.

"This is Dr. Lockhart," she said. Abby's face went white and her shoulders sagged. Chuny stood up and moved closer to her. "Um, how long ago? Okay...yes...please transfer me right now."

"Luka and Gillian were in a car accident," she told Chuny. "Luka is being taken up to surgery...oh...yes? Can you give me any information as to his condition? What about the other passenger?" Abby's eyes narrowed and she had a hard time swallowing. Her heart was beating so fast. Chuny put her arm around Abby's shoulders. Abby smiled wanly and looked up to find Jerry and Frank watching her as well. Jerry picked up the telephone near him and dialed some numbers. He turned away to talk and then said, 'HOW much?" Frank nudged him and took a wallet out of his pocket. He handed a credit card to Jerry, who took it and began talking into the telephone again.

"What's going on?" Neela asked as she came to the desk.

"Dr. Kovac has been in a car accident in Montreal," Frank said quietly. Neela's eyes widened in worry as she moved closer to Abby.

"Yes," Abby said. "I understand...As soon as I can...yes...thank you." She hung the telephone up and sighed.

"They are taking Luka in to surgery right now," she said. "A drunk driver broadsided their car. Gillian was driving and the car hit the passenger side. She is fine."

"Oh, Abby..." Neela breathed as she hugged her friend. Jerry hung up the telephone and handed the credit card back to Frank.

"There's a flight out to Montreal in 50 minutes," Jerry said. "There is a ticket waiting for you at Air Canada check in counter...and I just called a cab." Abby nodded slowly. Chuny pulled her away from the counter toward the lounge.

"Let's go get your things together," she said quietly as she kept her arm tightly around Abby. "He is going to be okay. With everything he has been through it would take more than a mere car to knock him down."

Ten minutes later Abby was settled into a cab that was speeding it's way to the mid town airport. She was zipped into Sam's down jacket and had Neela's hat and leather mittens in her lap. Sam had taken her apartment key and promised to take care of her mail and newspapers. Neela had the foresight to immediately call for a copy of her birth certificate and a notarized emergency photo id from personnel so she could cross the border back and forth from Canada easily. Frank...crazy old Frank...had waited outside in the snow with her and tucked her into the cab when it arrived. He actually blushed and hugged her when she kissed him on the cheek.

"Bring Dr. Kovac home with you," he said. "We have had enough of this nonsense. We need him too." Abby nodded as he shut the cab door.


	8. Montreal

Luka felt as if he were swimming through mud. Every muscle in his body ached with exertion. His eyelids were so heavy that he couldn't open them. He fell back into the swirling mist of dreams and floated. Danijela, Jasna and Marko ran just a head of him in the park in Vokovar...laughing and calling for him to come. He looked up at the sun sparkling through the bare trees...and then heard the whistle and boom as a a missle hit the apartment building behind him. "Nooooooo!"he cried and began to run. "He's my soul mate..." Carol's face loomed large in front of him. "I have to find out if he still loves me...my soul mate...my soul mate..." her voice echoed. The Bishop's whispered words of absolution...the African sun beating down on his head while he waited for the bullet that never came...reciting the Lord's Prayer from his childhood... and then Abby. "Not pretty enough," he heard himself saying to her, "...nothing special...I can't make you happy!" The hurt in her eyes tore into his heart and then he relaxed as the hurt changed to a sparkle. "...I passed my Boards after all...I am officially DR. Lockhart... BUG up my ASS, Luka, if you are going to insult me at least get the words right!..." Again came Carol's voice "...my soul mate..."

"I'm pregnant..." she said and his heart began to sing again. "Papa! Papi! Catch me, Papi!" Jasna cried happily from high in a swing, her long curly hair flying around her. He felt a tug on his leg and looked down into the dark eyes of his little son. Luka picked him up and tossed him into the air as Marko squealed with delight. Danijela laughed and pressed a kiss to his cheek as she took Marko from him.

"Go now, Luka," she said. "You are going to be late!" The mist swirled and he felt heavy again. "We always seem to find our way back to each another..." he heard himself saying. "I'm pregnant..." she said. Gillian screamed as a car bore down on their's and then...silence.

Luka's eyes flew open with a start. He didn't move but slowly took in his hospital room surroundings with his eyes. The room was bathed in soft light from a bedside lamp and he could see lights from the city through the window. It was night. He lifted his head slowly and saw the white cast that encased his right leg from toe to hip. He lifted his hand and saw the small cuts from broken glass on his arms. His head ached so he pressed it carefully back into the hospital bed pillow. He turned his head slowly and his eyes rested on the sleeping form sitting in a chair pulled close to the bed. Abby's head rested on her folded arms at his side. She still wore her familiar County Hospital scrubs and her face was turned away from him. He smiled slightly. She was snoring. He picked up a strand of her silky fine hair and rubbed it carefully between his fingers. He hesitated a moment and then laid his hand gently on her head. She turned to look at him and smiled.

"Hi..." she said softly and took his hand in her's. 'How are you feeling?"

"Sore..." he whispered. "Very sore."

"Yeah...well, you can kiss your plans for a career in major league baseball good bye," she said. "And say hello to a life time of metal detectors singing at the airport. They put four screws into your knee cap." She kissed his hand.

"A patella fracture?" he asked. She nodded.

" You have a concussion but no sign of any hematoma at this point. There is a very colorful shiner developing. Your spleen, kidneys and liver all checked out okay," Abby went on slowly. "And we owe Frank for a plane ticket." Luka chuckled. He drew her closer and kissed her. Abby slipped her arm around his neck gently and blinked back the tears in her eyes as she held him close. Luka drew back and looked into her eyes. His own filled with tears. Abby nodded and kissed him again. Sometimes words were not enough. She pulled away and lifted an envelope from the bedside table.

"Gillian left you a note," she said as she gave it to him. "If it's like the one she wrote to me, it says that she is sorry and that she is going back to Africa as soon as she can. Something about wanting to spend the rest of her life doing something she loves?" Abby sat back down in her chair.

"What?" she said wryly. "You didn't make it any...fun... while you were staying with her?" Luka closed his eyes and crumbled the note. It fell to the floor. He reached for Abby's hand and squeezed it tightly. Her eyes widened.

"Oh!" she said suddenly. "Guess what happened on the plane coming?" She took his hand and spread it across her stomach under her scrubs. She moved his fingers to the side a bit and then smiled.

"Did you feel it?" she asked. He opened his eyes and smiled softly at her. He couldn't feel it...not yet. But he would soon.

"Sleep with me?" he asked.

"They are bringing me a cot," she said. "I'll be right beside you." Luka shook his head.

"Sleep with me...here," he said. He held out his arm and Abby eased carefully on the hospital bed beside him. Luka snuggled her close and drifted off to sleep again. And it wasn't long before she joined him there.


	9. Symphony

"Wow! Cool cast!" Alex exclaimed as he rounded the end of Luka's couch. "Can I write something on it?"

"Only if it's clean," Luka warned. Alex rolled his eyes and swung his backpack off his shoulder. He unzipped a pocket and searched for a marker to write with.

Abby frowned slightly as she went through the stack of mail Alex had handed her.

"Special delivery..." she murmured when she saw the top envelope. Sam had attached a note saying it had been delivered by courier to the hospital the day before. She sat in a chair and opened the envelope. She read the letter and the tickets that had fallen out.

"Oh great..." she sighed. "You wouldn't want to go to the symphony with me, would you?" Luka straightened a bit and then indicated his cast.

"I would love to but I don't think I would fit in a seat right now," he said as he warily watched Alex drawing a figure on his cast.

'Where did they come from?" Luka asked.

"I had this patient about four weeks ago," Abby said. "It's kind of a thank you note."

"Man...did you kill him or something? Amputate something...vital... maybe?" Alex asked not looking up from his work.

"No..." Abby laughed. "I did a wonderful job suturing a finger laceration." Luka cast a glance at Abby and grinned as he nodded toward Alex. Abby grimaced in disbelief. Luka nodded toward Alex again. Abby shrugged.

"Um...Alex," she asked. "You wouldn't be interested in ...well...going with...me, would you?"

"Hell no!" Alex said.

"Hey!" Luka said firmly. 'Don't talk like that in my house."

" Okay..." the boy said. "But I still don't want to go."

"Oh...come on," Luka cajoled. "Abby needs an escort. I can trust you with her. It will be fun." Alex and Abby looked at one another for a moment and then rolled their eyes in unison.

Three days later Abby took a sideways glance at the boy sitting next to her in the Chicgao Symphony Orchestra's auditorium. She suppressed a smile and sighed softly. He was actually being a very good sport about the whole evening. He'd even brought her flowers... 'because Luka told him too.'

Alex slumped further in his seat and toyed with the dark tie Luka had loaned him to wear. He'd been very disappointed to find out there was no popcorn or candy counter during the intermission. The lights dimmed again and the audience sat in anticipation as the conductor made his entrance. There was applause and then a vocalist entered the stage. Abby glanced over at a still frowning Alex as the first notes of the operatic aria filled the auditorium. It would be a while yet before Carly's solo set. She reached across and hooked her fingers into his. Alex looked up at her in confusion. Abby winked and mouthed carefully and silently, "One, two, three, four...I declare a thumb war?" Alex sat up a little straighter and glanced around him. His fingers tightened on Abby's and they began sparring their thumbs.

When the house lights came up again and they were getting ready to leave, an usher appeared in the aisle.

"Dr. Lockhart?" he said. Abby nodded. "Miss Mendoza has requested that I bring you backstage if you have time." Abby nodded in surprise and glanced at Alex. She tipped her head toward the usher and Alex sighed.

Maybe we can get an autograph or something," she said. They followed the usher through the crowd toward the stage doors. The hubbub of the backstage area had a different tone that the crowd out front. Alex surveyed all the equipment and paraphernalia that was stored along the walls and behind the stage backdrop as he followed Abby. He looked up and saw a huge Christmas scene hanging from the ceiling. They entered a hall with lots of doors indicating they were rehearsal rooms and finally several with name plates on them. The usher tapped the door and it opened.

"Dr. Lockhart!" Carly's mother exclaimed. "It was so nice that you were able to come."

"Thank you for sending me the tickets," Abby said. "She was wonderful!" Carly appeared from around a dressing screen dressed in jeans and a sweater. She held her black satin performance dress out to her mother. Her long blonde curls, which had fallen over her shoulders as she performed, were caught back in a pony tail holder. Alex's mouth dropped open. She didn't look anything like she had on stage.

"Carly!" Abby exclaimed. "You were great! Why didn't you tell me you did this?" Carly flashed a bright smile at Abby and then dragged her huge blue eyes toward Alex. Her mother put the dress on a hanger and covered it with a garment bag before she put it on the hook on the wall.

"This is a friend of mine, Alex Taggert," Abby said. "Alex, this is Carly Mendoza."

"Hello," Carly said shyly. Alex shrugged.

"Hi," he said quietly. Abby suppressed a smile as the two teenagers surveyed one another. She nudged Alex and he trust his program toward Carly. She didn't take her eyes from him as she instinctively took the pen her mother held out for her. She scribbled something next to her photo in the program and then handed it back to Alex. Abby nudged him slightly.

"Oh...um...thanks," he said as he took the booklet from her. Carly smiled and nodded slowly. Her mother stared intently at her in surprise.

"You're welcome," Carly said, never taking his eyes off Alex. Abby snagged Alex's shirt in her fingers.

"Well, I need to get Alex home soon," she said. "I'm sure you both have school tomorrow."

"My Mom home schools me," Carly said.

"Cool..." Alex said slowly. Abby pulled him along to the door of the dressing room.

"Thanks again for the tickets," she said brightly. Carly's mother smiled and nodded in dismay.

"I couldn't believe it," Abby laughed as she helped Luka ease himself into bed. "I have never seen Alex tongue tied over anything."

"She's a tart," Luka said with a grin.

"She's thirteen," Abby said and tucked a pillow under his cast.

"She's a thirteen year old tart," he said.

"Okay...well, they are worlds apart from one another," she said. "They'll probably never see each other again." Luka folded his arms behind his head and watched Abby as she dressed for bed.

"You didn't see the autograph, did you?" he asked. Abby shook her head and ran a brush through her hair.

"Are you kidding?" she said. "He wouldn't let go of it."

"She wrote down her e-mail address," Luka said with a satisfied smile.

"How do you know that?" Abby asked as she climbed under the covers.

"Because Alex called as soon as he got home," Luka said. "He wants to come over tomorrow after school to use the computer for some... homework...project." Abby turned to look at him for a long moment.

"Oh no..." she said. "She is a little..."

"Tart," Luka finished. Abby and Luka began to giggle together and he pulled her on top of him for a long kiss. Abby pulled away and laughed.

"Speaking of tarts..." he said.

"Your cast..." she said.

"Is coming off tomorrow..." he said. "If I have to cut it off myself!" Abby laughed and snuggled back beside him.


	10. Firecrackers

"Well, would you look at that!" Greg Pratt said as he gestured toward the elevator doors. Luka was making his way toward the desk with a cane. His cast had been replaced with a less cumbersome leg brace.

"You are definitely on the mend there, man!" Pratt said as he exchanged high fives with Luka and headed toward one of the exam rooms. "Glad to see you back!" Luka grinned and then turned to Abby, who was standing across the desk from him.

"So, what did ortho have to say?" she asked.

"You were right about that baseball career thing," he shrugged and then added with a sly grin, "They put me on a physical therapy schedule and okayed a 'slight range of motion' that would be...safe." He winked seductively at her and turned around to make his way carefully through the busy corridor toward his office. Abby watched him as he stopped along the way to speak to people, to sign an offered chart and to laugh. She blinked back the tears that began to form in her eyes. Was it truly possible to care about someone as much as she cared about him? She'd never felt that before. She had to stop short and take a deep breath because it actually hurt.

Alex was waiting for them when they reached Luka's loft at the end of the day. He dropped his books on the couch and headed right for the computer station.

"Ho...wait," Luka said. "Homework first."

"This IS my homework," Alex insisted. Luka shook his head. Alex grimaced and went back to his backpack. He pulled out a Math textbook and sat down at the table. Luka opened the refrigerator and took out an apple. Alex looked up and caught it as Luka tossed it to him. Abby was caught a little off guard at the familiarity that was apparent between the two of them. She'd forgotten that it hadn't been that long ago that Alex...and Sam...had been living in this very place with Luka. She almost envied Alex having someone like Luka in his life at this age. How different things might have been for her if she'd had someone that she could have counted on when she was thirteen. Instead she'd spent that year covering for Maggie and taking care of Eric. That had been a horrible time for them and her face burned remembering. She was startled from her thoughts as Luka touched her cheek gently. He looked at her worriedly.

"What are you thinking?" he asked quietly. Abby shook her head.

"I'm just tired," she sighed. Luka took her coat off her shoulders.

"Go take a nap," he said. "I'll deal with Casanova here and fix something for dinner." Abby glanced down at the brace on his knee.

"It's nothing," Luka insisted. "It's my turn to take care of you." Abby sighed and kissed him.

"Thank you," she whispered and traced his smile with her fingers. She went into the bedroom and stretched out on top of the bedspread.

When she woke up later she'd been covered with a light blanket. The room was dark except for a single candle that burned on the bedside table. She stood up and pulled the blanket around her shoulders and extinguished the candle's flame. She wandered out into the livingroom and Luka looked up from his seat on the couch where he'd been reading. His leg was propped up on the coffee table which had also been set for her dinner.

"Feeling better?" he asked as he held out an arm. Abby sat on the couch and snuggled next to him. Luka sighed and set his book aside. He held her close and they sat quietly for a long moment.

"You missed some firecrackers while you were sleeping," he said. "Alex...forgot...to tell his mother he was coming here after school."

"Fireworks...," she corrected him and grimaced. "Ouch. Was Sam angry?"

" I...uh...think so,"Luka chuckled. "He won't be coming around here for a while."

"I like him," Abby said. "He's tough."

"Like you?" Luka asked. Abby tipped her face to look at him.

"Yeah..." she grinned. "Sometimes life will do that to you."

"Hungry?" he asked.

"Is there any doubt?" Abby rolled her eyes. Luka reached forward for the covered plate on the table and Abby pressed him back onto the couch. She took the cover off a plate of sliced cold cuts, boiled eggs, cheese and fruit. She looked at him disappointedly.

"Any chance that I could get a good old fashioned steak around here sometime? Like with this huge baked potato?" she groaned and settled back under his arm with the plate in her lap.

"Tomorrow," Luka laughed. Abby smiled and slipped a piece of cheese in her mouth. She looked up and lifted a strawberry to his lips. Luka's eyes were dark as he watched her eat her dinner. He played with the hair that fell across her shoulders.

"What were you thinking about?" he asked quietly. "This afternoon...before you took the nap?" Abby looked up for a moment, thinking.

"Oh," she said. "I was thinking about my life when I was thirteen." Abby shook her head.

"We were finally living in this rental house in Minnesota." she said. "Maggie had lost her job again and couldn't pay for her medication...not that she was good about taking it anyway...but needing the money didn't help." Luka stroked her head gently.

"It's a wonder I managed to pass in school that year," Abby shrugged. "Maggie would have us up all night long pacing and crying and trying to hide us from something only she saw." Abby fed him another strawberry.

"Then she would sleep so hard during the day that I could get Eric on the school bus where he'd fall asleep," she sighed. "But, it would start all over again...every night." She looked at him and smiled.

"We were both so terrified that someone would find out and come to take us away," she said, "you know... separate us from each other... that we were perfectly behaved students."

"No one ever knew..." her voice trailed off.

"I'm sorry," Luka whispered and kissed the top of her head. Abby smiled and shrugged.

"It's not your fault," she said. "I was thinking that Alex was lucky to have you in his life right now." Luka rubbed his face with his hand.

"I'm not so sure that Sam would agree with you," he sighed. "She accused me...us...of trying to take him away from her." Abby frowned.

"Maybe I should talk to her," she said. Luka grimaced and shook his head.

"Not a good idea, Abby," he said. "Not right now."

"But..." she said.

"Not now..." he repeated and bent to kiss her gently. Abby's hand slipped up to his neck and she held him close as they kissed again.

"I have other things on my mind..." he sighed heavily as he slipped his hands inside the warm blanket cocoon she had wrapped around her. Abby chuckled and reached up to wrap her arms around his neck. Neither of them noticed when the plate slipped off her lap and fell to the floor.


	11. Mothers

Luka peeked into the darkened exam room. She was sound asleep on a gurney. He smiled softly and watched her for a long moment. She looked so vulnerable when she slept. He sighed heavily. He was overwhelmed with protectiveness. It had been easier with the mugger...Brian, her neighbor...with people who had attacked her physically. He could put them in their place. But there was a fear within her that he had not been able to touch...yet.

"Luka," Chuny came up behind him. "Automobile accident coming in. Three victims...all critical...ETA is three minutes." Luka nodded.

"Abby?" he said. "Come on. We need you." She opened her eyes and sighed.

"Well...that was nice," she said. "I should be good for another hour or so." He laughed as she climbed off the gurney and they hurried down the corridor to the ambulance bay. Sam was coming in the door. Luka threw her a glance and tipped his head toward the doors.

"Three crits coming in, Sam," he said. She nodded and hurried to shove her things behind the admit desk. Two ambulances rolled up to the doors and the back doors swung open. The rolling gurneys were pulled out and paramedics hustled the patients inside.

"Male, 33...blunt trauma to the head...dislocated shoulder" one called.

"Pratt!" Luka called out. Greg Pratt nodded and helped push the stretcher to an exam room.

"Female...aged 3...backseat passenger...car seat incorrectly fastened..." a paramedic cried. "Name's Kristin."

"This one's crashing!" someone called as a third stretcher was pushed inside. Luka hurried to assist as the gurney careened into the nearest trauma room with Ray close behind. Abby and Sam took the gurney with the little girl into the room next door.

"Mommy!" the little girl screamed. Sam bent over her and adjusted the neck brace and oxygen mask that had been placed on her in the ambulance.

"It's okay sweetie," she said as she cut away the little girl's bloodied shirt. There was a gash over her eye.

"Oh geez..." she breathed as she saw the bruises from the seat belt that already crossed the baby's chest. Abby looked up from the blood pressure cuff and her eyes met Sam's. The little girl screamed again and Abby bent down to examine the cut closer.

"Let's get a butterfly on this right away," Abby said. Chuny nodded and gently pressed a gauze sponge to the cut.

"I want my Mommy..." Kristin screamed. Sam leaned over her and held her in place gently.

"Kristin? I like your pony tails. Did Mommy put those ribbons in?" Abby spoke calmly as she carefully examined the little girl's extremities and chest. The little girl was clammybut responsive to pain. " Let's get a type, CBC, serum amylase..."

"Probable rib fracture on the left side," she continued. "We need an x-ray." Chuny hooked the heart monitor to the little heaving chest and the blips sounded in the room.

"Blood pressure is dropping," Sam warned. Kristin stopped mid scream and vomited. Abby turned her gently on her side and Sam helped clear her mouth.

"What have we got here?" Luka asked.

"Three year old with blunt trauma to the chest," Abby said. "Probable broken rib on the left side, tenderness to the abdomen and left shoulder, dropping blood pressure and rapid heart rate."

"Spleen...," Luka said. "There's an open OR now. Let's get her out of here. They can an ultrasound upstairs. Call and let them know they will need a pediatric surgeon instead. I'll go with her." Sam detached the monitor lines and tossed them onto the gurney. She reached for the telephone on the wall.

Abby tucked a warmed blanket over the little girl and helped Luka push the gurney to the elevator. She smiled worriedly as he pressed his stethescope to the little girl's chest. The elevator doors closed in front of her and they were gone. When she turned back to the corridor she saw Dori pulling a sheet over the lifeless figure of the woman in the trauma room next to the one she'd just used.

"Oh damn," she sighed. Sam came out of the trauma room pushing a red hazard container. She followed Abby's gaze and frowned sadly.

"How is her Dad?" Sam asked. Abby shrugged and shook her head. Sam looked back at Abby and then averted her eyes quickly as she pushed the covered container to it's place in the hall.

" I haven't seen you in a while, Sam," Abby said. "We seem to be on opposite shifts. How are you?"

"Fine..." Sam said. "Busy. You know." Abby nodded. Sam's eyes dropped to Abby's waistline and then she smiled slightly.

"You're looking good," she said. Abby chuckled.

"Yeah...right," she said. "Ever growing...always eating and constantly sleeping" she said with a satisfied pat to her side. Sam's smile faded wistfully.

"Well," she said. "I need to go check in." Abby watched Sam head for the admit desk to retrieve her purse and jacket. She frowned slightly and followed Sam.

'Do you have a minute?" she asked her. "It's kind of quiet." Sam looked around and then shrugged. She followed Abby into the doctor's lounge and dropped her things on the table. She crossed her arms and waited.

"Look," Abby said. 'I am not good at small talk, especially when I have

something on my mind so I am just going to come out with it." Abby took a deep breath.

"I think you are really making a mistake keeping Alex away from Luka," she said.

"Well, that's my decision to make, isn't it?" Sam replied. "I'm his mother."

"You're a good mother, Sam," Abby said. "Why would you want tohandle this alone?"

"I can take care of my son," she retorted angrily. "I always have."

"You are always on the run from someone or something," Abby said sharply. "I grew up like that and it's not pretty." Sam's mouth dropped open in disgust.

"Are you comparing me to your mother?" she said angrily, 'because if you are..."

"I am comparing Alex to me," Abby interrupted her. "It took me a long time to learn to trust...and maybe I still can't do it completely... but do you really want him to be like that? He's a thirteen year old boy. He is going to need someone to talk to. If it can't be his dad or...or someone else...wouldn't you rather it be Luka ? Someone that cares about him?"

Sam glared at her for a long moment and then gathered her coat and purse from the table. Without a word she opened the lounge door just as Luka appeared in front of her. Sam looked up at him wordlessly for a moment and then stepped around him. He watched her as she hurried toward the staff locker room. Luka frowned and turned to Abby.

"Abby..." he asked slowly. "What did you do?" Abby sighed heavily and shrugged.

"Are you ready to go home?" she asked. Luka shook his head.

"I want to wait and see how the little girl does in surgery," he said. "We lost her mother today." Abby nodded.

" I'm going to go to my place tonight," she said. Luka nodded.

"That's fine," he said. "I'll see you there later." Abby shook her head slowly.

"I think I want to be alone for a while," she said softly. "Okay?" Luka crossed the room and tipped her face up to look into her eyes.

"What did you and Sam say to each other?" he asked.

"Nothing important," she said. 'I'm just feeling a little melancholy." She smiled softly and he kissed her.

"Put your coat on and I will walk you out," he said. Abby took her hospital jacket off and hung it in her locker. She slipped her arms into the sleeves of her coat and buttoned it as Luka watched her. He draped his arm across her shoulders as they walked out of the ambulance bay into the night. He hailed her a cab and stood watching until the cab was out of sight.


	12. Overload

The answering machine was blinking when she got to her apartment. She pressed the button and sighed deeply. It was her mother. Abby settled herself on the couch and pushed the auto dial button on the phone.

"Hi, Mom," Abby said when Maggie answered. They talked for a while...Maggie going a mile a minute about a new job...a new friend... a new hair color. Listening to her, Abby felt herself being pulled back into her childhood. All the manic episodes when it was almost fun to be part of Maggie's world...followed by the deep and long lasting depressions.

She sat in the dark for a long time after Maggie hung up. Her thoughts were racing...and piling up...and racing...and piling up. She felt bile begin to build up in her throat. She felt rooted to her seat on the couch.

Abby picked up the phone again and dialed the only number that she could think of. She swallowed hard as she waited for someone to answer.

"Susan..."Abby choked. "Can you talk to me for a while...please?"

"Abby?" Susan asked worriedly. "What's the matter?"

"I...I can't breathe..." she choked. "I can't move off the couch..."

"Abby", Susan asked quietly but sternly. "Where's Luka?" Abby clung tightly to the phone and blinked back the tears in her eyes.

"He's at the hospital," she choked. "He is waiting for a patient to come out of surgery."

"Okay," Susan's voice was calming. "Think about what you are telling me. How are you feeling?" Abby's heart was racing and she swallowed. She had drawn herself into a tight ball on the couch.

"I can't...I can't breathe..." she said. "My heart is pounding..." Abby choked and closed her eyes tightly. "It hurts."

'Honey...take a deep breath for me now..." Susan was beginning to panic on the other end. Abby pressed the phone to her ear and nodded. She stopped and took a deep breath.

"Let it out, Abby," Susan ordered. 'I can't hear you breathing. Abby?"

"I'm here," she managed to say.

"Think, Abby," Susan asked. "Are you having any pain anywhere else?"

"Just when I breathe," Abby said. "And my head is ringing."

"Take another breath, Abby," Susan ordered. "In...and out. In and out... You're doing fine. I can hear you. Is it better now?" Abby was silent as she squeezed her eyes shut and concentrated on taking slow and easy breaths.

"I think you're having a panic attack, Abby," Susan said. "Either that or your blood pressure is soaring. Try to relax. I'm going to have Chuck call Luka on our cell phone."

"No...don't do that," Abby cried. "I'll be fine." She breathed in and out slowly and the pain in her chest began to lessen.

'What happened?" Susan demanded when Abby was calmer.

"I talked to Maggie tonight," Abby said.

"Damn it, Abby," Susan scolded. "You are no longer allowed to talk to your mother OR your brother unless someone is home with you! Do you hear me?"

"Yes ma'am," Abby smiled a little.

"And you are to tell Coburn about this," Susan ordered. "When is your next appointment?"

"Next week," Abby let out a deep breath.

"What did Maggie say to you?" Susan asked.

"It was nothing," Abby said as she straightened a little on the couch. "She just sounded..."

"Like she is off her meds again?" Susan finished.

"No," Abby said. "Not like that...it's just remembering" Abby stopped as she felt the rising panic again.

"Let's not talk about that now," Susan said calmly. "What's going on at the hospital these days? How are Neela and Ray? Chuny?" Before long Abby was calm and chuckling a little as she and Susan traded stories. The apartment door opened and Luka strode in. He shut the door, threw his coat off and crossed the room to her. He turned on the light next to her. He had a dark frown on his face. Abby looked up for a second and then dissolved into tears as he sat next to her. She dropped the phone and pressed herself against him. Luka wrapped his arms around her as she began to sob. He reached for the telephone. He held Abby close.

"Thank you for calling me, Susan," he said. "I'm home now."

"Take care of her, Luka," Susan said. "For God's sake do not let her talk to her mother when she is home alone any more." Luka nodded.

"We'll call you again tomorrow," he said and hung up the phone. He held Abby for a long moment and then moved to sit with her on the couch. Abby clung to him as he waited for the sobs to stop. Luka took a blood pressure cuff out of his jacket pocket and put his stethoscope in his ears. Abby shook her head.

"I'm fine..." her voice trailed off as he frowned at her. She was quiet as he took her blood pressure.

"It's okay," he said as he took the cuff off her arm. He gazed at her sternly.

"Do you want to talk to me now?" he asked. Abby shook her head.

"I'm okay...really," she said. "It's just...Maggie." Tears welled up in her eyes again. "How can we do this, Luka? How can we do this to a baby?" Luka wrapped his arms around her carefully.

"Our baby is fine," he said gently.

"When it was just me, I could handle it. I've learned how to get through things, you know?" she said tearfully. "But how can I keep this baby safe? How can I stop this from happening to it?" Luka held her away from him and tipped her face to his.

"You listen to me," he said. "You're not alone anymore. You don't have to hide in a closet. You don't have to _pretend_ that everything is all well...any more." Abby nodded and sniffed.

"We will both take care of our child," he said firmly. 'No matter what happens. I promise you. You are not...in this...all...alone." She looked at him and started to cry again.

"Damn these hormones," she sobbed. Luka chuckled and hugged her close for a long time.


	13. Susan

"So, why am I doing this again?" Abby asked as she tapped her fingers impatiently on the arm rest of the hard bucket seat in the airport concourse.

"Because it's a good idea," Luka said absently as he checked over her ticket information. "Susan wants to see you. She wants to show off their new house."

"But I could be home..." she started.

"Pacing and cleaning and sleeping and eating," Luka finished for her with a grin. "You can do that just as easily at Susan's house. Besides, I'm on the schedule all weekend. I won't have to worry about you being home alone."

"You know, Maggie is going to be angry if she finds out I did this," Abby said. "She is going to want me to come to Minnesota."

"It's too cold in Minnesota, right now," Luka said evenly as he continued to read. "We'll all go after the baby is born...when it's warmer." Abby studied his profile with a stubborn frown. Luka looked up as the boarding announcement was made and a door opened to admit passengers to the plane. He stood up and lifted the carry on bag that held her things. He pulled Abby up gently and she took the bag from him. His kissed her and then pushed her in the direction of the door.

"Go on," he said. "Have a good time. I'll call you tonight." She waved to him as she disappeared down the covered ramp to the plane. She found her seat, put the bag in the overhead storage and settled next to the window. It was a short flight and she slept most of the way. Susan was waiting for her when she disembarked.

"Oh my God...Abby!" Susan threw her arms around her and hugged her. 'I can't believe you are really here!" She stepped back and grinned broadly as she gave her friend a visual once over.

"You look...beautiful," she said breathlessly. "And there's a baby in there!" She widened her eyes a bit with an unasked question and Abby nodded in feigned resignation. She opened her coat. Susan giggled and pressed a hand to Abby's belly.

"I don't know if this is such a good idea after all," she said. 'You're going to make me want to do it all over again!" Abby laughed as Susan took the carry on bag from her and linked their arms.

"I gotta remember...swollen feet...hemorrhoids...labor...we need to get home quick...so I can remind myself what life is like with a three year old!" Susan said. Abby laughed. Luka had been right. This was what she needed. She felt as a two ton weight had been lifted from her shoulders.

Susan drove her through the snow drifted streets of Des Moines and pointed out her new hospital, a shopping mall and the preschool that Cosmos attended. They talked nonstop for the entire sixty minute drive to the house. And it was a wonderful three days. They were up early for breakfast with Chuck and Cosmos. They stayed up till all hours talking and played a continuous game of 'Scrabble'.

"You don't play this with Luka?" Susan asked as they were putting the board away one night. Abby shrugged with a smile.

"He cheats," she said. "He sneaks Croatian words in on me. Who keeps a dictionary like that around...even if I could read it?" Susan laughed.

The tea kettle whistled and she hurried to turn it off before the shrill sound woke a sleeping Chuck and Cosmos. She poured them each a cup of tea and added a liberal dash of milk to Abby's cup. She carried the cups to the overstuffed couch where Abby had curled up under a knit shawl.

"Thank you," Abby said as she took a sip.

"How is Luka handling the Chief position?" Susan asked as she settled herself at the other end of the couch.

"He loves it," Abby said.

"He should," Susan nodded. "He's perfect for it." They sipped their tea in silence for a moment.

"Is he excited about the baby?" Susan asked finally. Abby nodded. Susan studied her face.

"You don't look so sure about that," she said. "What's wrong?"

"Oh...I know he's thrilled about the baby," Abby said. "There's just something...never mind."

"Abby, " Susan sat up a little straighter. "Tell me." Abby took a sip of her tea and looked at Susan thoughtfully.

"I'm not sure that he is happy that he is having it with me," she said and took a deep breath.

"You have got to be kidding!" Susan exclaimed and then grimaced. She cocked her head and listened to the quiet house. Then she turned back to Abby.

"How could you even think that?" she asked. Abby shrugged.

"He was still living with Sam barely a month before we...well...you know," Abby said.

"So...you think this is some kind of...rebound thing?" Susan shook her head. Abby didn't respond.

"Abby, " Susan said firmly. "If anything, Sam was a rebound from you. You and Luka have a long history together. You've been friends. Think about everything that he's gone through with you...Carter...Africa...Gillian...and you're together now."

"I know he's joking but he talks about custody fights...," Abby said as she took another sip of her tea. "I won't ever doubt that he won't be there for this baby. I just don't think he will be there for me." A tear slipped down her cheek. Susan watched her sadly and then handed her a tissue from the box on the table. Abby dabbed at her eyes and sighed.

"Maggie told me once...a long time ago...that Luka stared at me all the time when I wasn't watching," Abby said. "I'm afraid that we may have lost that."

"You haven't, Abby," Susan said quietly. "Maybe you are what is scaring the hell out of him. Maybe he is afraid of moving too fast because he might lose you again. You have a tendency to back off when things get to be too good for you. I mean, I love you to death, sweetie, but you aren't exactly the poster child for a stable relationship." Abby laughed and then yawned wearily.

"Aw...I've kept you up too late," Susan said and then added, "I've kept ME up too late. I have to work tomorrow. " They stood up and Susan took the tea mugs and put them in the kitchen. She put her arm across Abby's shoulders and walked her to the stairs.

"I am going to miss you so much," Susan said as she hugged her. "I have to go in early so Chuck is going to take you to the airport. Don't you ever forget that I'm..."

"...only a phone call away," they said in unison. Abby smiled and hugged her.

Abby's plane arrived in Chicago a bit early so she was very surprised to see Luka waiting for her at the arrival gate.

"What are you doing here?" Abby laughed as Luka picked her up in an embrace. "I told you I would take a cab."

"I missed you," he sighed and kissed her.

"It's only been three days," she laughed as he set her back down.

"Too long," he smiled. He took the stuffed circular pillow she was carrying and looked at in confusion.

"What's this?" he asked.

"It's a boppy," Abby said. "Susan loaned it to me."

"Boppy?" he asked.

"Yeah, you put it around your lap to help hold the baby when you are nursing," she said absently as she checked her carry on bag. Luka looked at the pillow in confusion.

"You need a round pillow to nurse a baby?" he asked. Abby looked up at him and then laughed.

"Oh...and look at this," she said as she opened her coat. She was wearing a silkish green tee shirt with the words 'Knocked Up' written gracefully across the front. "It's stretchy!" Luka grinned. The sparkle that had been missing from her brown eyes was back.

"Come on," she said as she grabbed his arm and tugged. "I can't wait to go to bed."

"Bed? But it's only..." he looked at her and then grinned. "Ohhh..." Abby chuckled and dragged him through the airport tarmac.

"Come on..."she said. "It's been three days."


	14. Luka

Luka grinned as he reached down to turn off the blaring alarm clock on the table next to her bed. He leaned over close to her.

"Abby," Luka whispered in her ear. "Time to get up. You slept through your alarm." Abby sat straight up suddenly and they bumped heads.

"Oww..." Luka groaned as he fell onto the coverlet holding his forehead.

"Are you okay?" she asked holding her own.

"I didn't know you were awake," he said as he sat up. Abby climbed out of bed.

"I wasn't but you said I was late...hold on... I'll get you something." She pulled a robe on over her pajamas and hurried out of the bedroom. She came back with a bag of peas from the freezer.

"Peas? Ow!" he yelped as she pressed the bag to his forehead.

"Oh, come on...don't be such a baby," she laughed. "Let me see."

She tipped his head up and grimaced when she saw the knot forming on his forehead. She pressed the bag of frozen peas to it again and Luka grinned when he realized that he was sitting eye level to her breasts and rounding belly. His hands crept around her waist to the small of her back and leaned his head forward to lay his ear against her stomach. He closed his eyes and smiled as he felt the gentle rollings of his child moving. He drank in the soft scent of the lotion he'd helped her rub into her skin the night before. He'd forgotten. He'd just plain forgotten this sweetness. Marko had been a kicker from the beginning. Danijela had always complained that he was destined to be a soccer star. It was so unexpected because Jasna had been different...not quite as strong...very small and feminine even before she was born. But this...having lost them, this was so, so sweet.

"Uh, Luka...I need to go," she said. His hands tightened gently.

"No...stay," he sighed, not lifting his head. "The boss is telling you it's all right to be late today."

"Well, Pratt won't appreciate that. He has been on duty all night," Abby complained. "Come on...let me go. I need to take a shower." Luka's eyes suddenly opened wide. He drew back and looked up at her.

"Shower?" he said with a lecherous grin. Abby laughed and tossed the bag of frozen peas onto the bed as she turned toward the bathroom. Luka jumped up and ripped his tee shirt over his head as he raced her to the bathroom door.

They rode the El into work together. Luka headed up early for an administrative staff meeting and Abby signed in at the ER admit desk. Pratt was grilling the incoming interns from the board. She listened to the rapid exchanges and then took one of the clipboards he was handing around.

'They are all yours, Abby-girl," Pratt said as he yawned. 'Morris is with a patient and I am out...of...here. Have a good one, people." Chuny glanced at the chart Abby held in her hand.

"Ah...bounce back stomach flu," Chuny said. "It's the third one since I came on. Looks like it's going to be a long day." Abby rolled her eyes and headed off to a curtained area with an intern close behind her.

The staff meeting was longer than he expected and Luka was tired of haggling over reports and schedules. He checked the board at the admittance desk and spoke to Jerry. Then he'd locked himself in his small office down in the ER to go over the paperwork that had been handed to him at the meeting. Insurance regulations. How he hated that stuff. So many of the ER patients were nonpaying anyway. He sighed and tossed it aside.

Luka pulled his wallet from his back pocket and leaned back in his chair. He reached into a hidden pocket and pulled out a slightly tattered but carefully preserved photo. His eyes softened and a slight smile formed on his lips. He caressed the photo with his thumb. Danijela and Jasna at a 4th birthday party. It was the only picture that he had of them. He'd had a larger copy made from this print for a frame but it wasn't as clear...as in focus as this little one was. That was funny. They were such a huge part of his past...what brought him to this place in his life...and the only physical reminder he had was this little square of photo paper. He had nothing of Marko...just the images that he could bring forth from his memories whenever he wanted to. He wondered - sometimes - if the things he remembered had really happened or if he just made them up because he wanted those memories to be there. He slipped the picture back into it's hiding place and flipped through the photo insert until he found her picture. Luka smiled fondly. He'd taken the photo just last week. It was warmer so they'd gone for a walk at the top of the Navy Pier after an early dinner. The wind had been blowing and her top was hugging her belly. She had been trying to get him to try the ferris wheel with her so there was a sly grin on her face. She didn't like him snapping pictures of her so he'd been lucky to have caught such a good one.

Abby. She had been his rescuer more times than he could count. She had always been there to catch him...except for the awful days when he'd actually given up looking for a new life and had used many women to ease his sadness. She'd been with Carter then and the inexplicable pain of that had eaten away at him. Gabrielle and Sam hadn't touched that part of him that he'd thought had died with his family. But Abby had found it again. They'd had problems but somehow seemed to muddle through them every time. There was no more running away for either of them. He laughed with Abby. Deep, soul shaking laughs. And he loved the banter they could engage in. And there was so much to learn about her. Just when he thought he knew everything he'd find out something new. She'd been so angry when he'd sent in her medical school paperwork but he had been right to do it. He'd given her much needed self confidence and her dream. She was giving him a child...a chance to be a father again. It was his own dream. But even when he thought she'd decided not to carry it, he had still wanted her in his life. She was his life. His heart began to swell in his chest and he sighed. There was a tap on his door and Chuny stuck her head in.

"Luka, Morris said to tell you there is a multiple trauma coming in," she said. "Preschool bus on a field trip. Could be kind of ugly." He nodded and stood up. He shoved his wallet back into his pocket and strode out into the corridor. They were waiting when the ambulances pulled up. Luka followed Ray with a gurney carrying the injured driver. He stood back and watched Ray run the trauma snapping orders to the nurse and intern with him, ready to step in if he was needed. Morris was in the next trauma room with an injured teacher who kept insisting that she was fine...in spite of the blood pouring down her face from a scalp lac. Haleh appeared with gauze sponges to staunch the blood. He glanced out the door and saw Abby, Dori and Chuny headed toward the trauma room on the other side. They were each carrying two preschoolers. Luka saw them set the six youngsters on the bed and watched as Abby did a quick check of their shoulders and necks. She went from one to the other with an otoscope quickly checking eyes and ears as Dori slipped new covers on. He could hear them crying.

"Okay, Ray?" Luka asked.

"Got it," Ray said confidently. Luka moved toward Trauma 3 and Abby waved a hand to stop him.

"They're fine," she said. "The paramedics said they were all buckled into their seats. Doesn't even appear to be any whiplash. We're just waiting for parents to arrive. The school was calling them as they were being loaded in the ambulances."

"We are lucky," he said over the crying. "The other injuries look pretty minor as well." The wails from some of the children grew louder and he went to a nearby telephone. He spoke to the volunteer office and requested an available candy striper to the ER to help. He watched as Abby put her stethoscope into the ears of one little boy and pressed the diaphragm to his Elmo shirt. He looked up at her with wide eyes and an open mouth. Chuny and Dori busied themselves comforting and playing with the others, trying to calm them. Abby grinned and moved the diaphragm to her own heart. She reached over to caress the cheek of a solemn little girl who was watching. Abby bent over and whispered something in the little girl's ear and she giggled. Luka grinned slightly. Abby didn't feel like she worked well with smaller children but they adored her. She was very good at making them comfortable. Abby picked Elmo up and he instinctively locked his legs around her waist. She carried him out of the trauma room still playing with her stethoscope. She stopped in front of Luka and he chucked the little boy under the chin and grinned.

"Ben!" someone called from the direction of the admit desk.

"Mommy!" cried the child in Abby's arms. Luka looked up as a couple hurried toward them. The well dressed woman took her son from Abby and hugged him tight. His father brushed the back of the child's head and sighed in relief.

"He's fine," Abby assured them as she untangled her stethoscope from the boy's neck. "They all are fortunately."

"Oh my god...Abby," the boy's father said as they turned their attention away from the little boy to her when she spoke. Abby looked at him in disbelief.

"Richard..." she breathed. His eyes traveled to the name that was embroidered over the pocket of her coat, _'"A. Lockhart, M.D."_

"You did it," he said quietly. "You finished med school." He frowned slightly when his eyes traveled to her stomach. Abby pulled the jacket closed and folded her arms across her chest.

"Yes," she said flatly. Her ex-husband nodded.

"Good," he said. "Good for you. You look...great." He put his arm around his wife and they headed back to the admit desk to officially claim their son.

"That was Richard?" Luka asked. "Haven't seen him in a while." Abby nodded as she watched them. Richard glanced back again, smiled sadly and waved.

"He is kind of...smaller," Luka said quietly. Abby looked up at him quizzically. Luka shrugged. She burst out laughing and Luka grinned. He kissed her forehead and pushed her back into the room with the other children.


	15. Possessed

"Out of my way, Clemente," Abby scowled. "I don't have any time for your crap today."

"Wo...the she devil has arisen," Clemente replied snidely and sidled out of Abby's way. Abby cast him a killing glance and pulled another file from the stand on the counter. She sighed and looked up at the board.

"Jerry," she scolded. "That flu guy was released an hour ago. What is he doing up on the board?" Jerry looked up from the papers he was filing.

"Uh...someone forgot take him off?" he shrugged. Abby slammed the chart onto the counter and wiped the name off the board. Jerry grimaced and backed away.

"And you go home...every night...with...that?" Jerry whistled softly as Luka approached the desk.

"Abby," Luka warned. She turned to look at him and he nodded toward the doctor's lounge door. Her face burned as she followed him. She sighed deeply as he turned to face her in the empty room.

"Well...this situation certainly has the principal's office written all over it," she said.

"What is going on here?" Luka demanded. "There have been some complaints about you today."

"From patients?" Abby demanded.

"No. From the staff," he said. "Why are you treating people like this?" Abby was silent.

"They are your friends...and they care about you." Abby rolled her eyes. "They are only trying to help."

"Luka, we have been through this before. I don't want anyone's help...or anyone's pity."

"Pity?" He was aghast. "They don't pity you. Abby, they are excited for you. Let them help if they want to." She folded her arms stubbornly and sighed.

"Take a break," Luka ordered and then turned to leave the lounge. "Sit down, relax and calm yourself."

"I don't have time to...relax," she said. "I have patients out there."

"Not any more," he said, turning back to her.

"Are you sending me home?" Abby asked incredulously. Luka sighed.

"I am telling you this ER, and everyone here, needs to work as a team. If you are not respectful of that or willing to do that, then..." his voice trailed off.

"...leave?" Abby said. She crossed her arms and looked up at him with a frown on her face.

"Take...a...break," he repeated. "And think very seriously about apologizing." Luka shook his head and left the room. Abby dropped down into a chair and sighed angrily. He was right. She HAD been out of line today and was taking it out on the wrong people. It was so frustrating to not be at the top of her game. Everyone was always trying to help...to lft things...to run for things. That's not how she worked. She was always the one who did for other people.

The door opened slightly and Ray stuck his head in.

"Is it safe to come in yet?" he asked. Abby rolled her eyes.

"I mean, you're not going to throw anything, right? I have to get my lunch from the fridge...and...a few...others."

Abby tapped her fingers on the table trying to ignore him as he carefully eased himself through the lounge door. Abby shook her head as he kept one eye on her and sidled past to the refrigerator. He opened it and took out a brown paper bag...and then a covered salad bowl...and then a red plastic lunch box...and a deli sandwich wrapped in waxed paper...

"Oh, come on, Ray," she growled. "I am not going to kill anyone if they come in here to eat their lunch."

"Promise?" he asked. She nodded sarcastically.

"The lounge is open, dudes!" he called. The door opened and ER personnel poured in. They busied themselves getting their lunches and finding a place to sit. Abby stood up.

"Okay..." she announced. "I am sorry for the way I have been acting. It's most likely a hormonal thing from being...pregnant. I promise I won't let it get to me again."

"Abby's pregnant?" Jerry said innocently. "Why didn't someone tell me?" Laughter rippled through the room. Victor Clemente sidled over to her and put his arm around her shoulders.

"My mother was pregnant," he said. 'This woman is not pregnant. This woman is...possessed." Ray jumped up.

"Oooh...like that Arnold movie..." he said and put his hand up inside his Grateful Dead tee shirt. Abby shook her head as he mimicked a puppet head forcing it's way through his shirt from his chest as people around him laughed. Her eyes met Luka's where he was standing leaning against the door frame. He winked at her.

"An alien?" Luka chuckled as he folded his dinner napkin and laid it on the table.

"But it is like some kind of alien has taken over my body," she said as sat back in her chair. 'It tells me what to eat...when sleep...when to pee..." She shook her head. "I don't like not having control." Luka reached over to touch her shoulder and Abby pulled away from him.

"Don't touch me," she said sternly. His hand dropped to the table and he shrugged.

"These feelings are very normal," he said quietly. "You know that."

"Don't patronize me, Luka, okay?" she sniped. "If I want to be a bitch, I am going to be one." Luka was silent for a long moment. Wordlessly he stood up and carried his dinner plate to the sink. He began to fill the sink with hot water and rinsed his dishes. He set them aside and then picked a medical journal up off the counter. Abby watched as he crossed the room and settled himself in a big chair next to a lamp and opened the book. She drummed her fingers on the table and then rose to take care of her own dishes. Luka watched her secretively and smiled slightly. He dropped his eyes to the open pages as she moved to the couch in front of him. She stretched out, put her feet up on a cushion and leaned back against the arm rest. She sighed and picked up her own book from the coffee table. Abby tried to read but couldn't get comfortable on the couch. The baby was kicking her fiercely. Finally she sat up straight and looked at him.

"It makes me crazy that you have answers for everything...that you've been through it before," she said suddenly.

"I haven't been through it with you," he stated without looking up from the book. "There's a difference." Luka closed the book slowly and looked at her.

"Danijela had her mother, her sisters and her friends to share things with...to talk to," he said softly. "Sometimes, I was just the..._budala_... who happened to be there when the baby was conceived." Abby's eyes narrowed in misunderstanding.

"Idiot..." Luka said. "It means idiot."

"_Budala_?" she mulled. 'I am going to have to remember that one." Luka shook his head and chuckled. Abby looked down at her belly in frustration.

"Go to sleep...would you please!" she groaned. "My back hurts." Luka studied her sympathetically. Abby glared at him darkly and sighed.

"Can I help you?" he asked carefully. Abby sighed and moved over a bit on the couch. Luka stood up and picked up a knitted shawl that lay over the back of his chair. He sat down on the couch next to her and wrapped the shawl around both of them. He snuggled her under his arm and held her close. She turned slightly and rested her head on his chest. He rubbed his hand over her belly and grinned when he felt the baby kicking fiercely.

"It's not funny..." she said. "I can't get comfortable."

"It's wonderful," he sighed happily. "Healthy and alert.'

"My back hurts," she said again and leaned forward a little. Luka chuckled and slipped his hand to the small of her back and rubbed.

"How can you even stand to be around me?" she sighed. Luka chuckled and turned her so he could massage her neck and shoulders.

"Have you talked to your mother lately?"

"No," Abby said. Luka pulled back in surprise and looked at her.

"You haven't told her yet, have you?"

"No."

"Abby..." he said. "We're having a baby in less that three months. Don't you think you need to tell her?"

"Okay...okay...fine. Hand me the telephone," she snapped. Luka took the phone from it's stand on the table and handed it to her. She sat up and scowled at him as she pushed the buttons and then waited for someone to answer. Her sneering eyes never left his face.

"Hi Mom," she said finally and took a deep breath. "Um...look...I'm pregnant...Luka is the father and we're having the baby in July. I love you...I'll call you again soon." She pushed the button to end the call and handed the phone back to him.

"Satisfied?" she asked as she settled back in the crook of his arm. Luka's mouth dropped open. The telephone began to ring and Luka reached for it.

"Don't answer that," Abby ordered.

"It might be the hospital," he said. Abby shook her head.

"They would page you," she said. 'You and I both know who is on the other end of that call."

"If you don't talk to her," he said. "She's going to get on a bus and come down here. Do you want that?" Abby scowled at him.

"Damn... I hate it when you're right," she growled. She took the phone from him and scowled again as she answered. Luka chuckled and snuggled her back against him and listened as she talked to Maggie.


	16. Home Run

"Remember the last time we were here together? Was it...four... years ago?" Maggie was all smiles as she settled herself on the lowest bleacher bench and made room for Abby. "Do you think Luka understands the game a little better?"

"I am sure he does, Mom. He's played every summer since then," Abby sat next to her on the bench and surveyed the baseball field under the night lights.

"NICU has a killer team this year," she said and glanced at Maggie. Abby blushed as she realized that her mother was watching her.

"What's the matter?" she asked. Maggie smiled

"You look...so beautiful."

"Oh yeah..."Abby snorted and looked down at herself. Her favorite 'Knocked Up' tee shirt was stretched snugly over her belly and maternity jeans. She reached up and pulleda straggly pony tail over her shoulder and grinned. Maggie picked up one of her hands and held it in hers.

"Beautiful...and peaceful." Tears glistened in Maggie's eyes.

"Oh...don't cry," Abby pleaded playfully. Maggie sighed.

"This has been wonderful for me, Abby, to see you like this," she said. "It makes it easier to go home again."

"It's been good for me too," Abby looked at her. "You're going home?"

"Well, you're all moved into the new apartment...everything is unpacked...the nursery is set up and ready...I have a job I need to get back to...and Eric." Abby's face fell and Maggie hugged her.

"Honey, you will be fine without me," she said. "You always have been. Eric is coping but he needs someone there. You know that."

"But it doesn't mean that I don't wan...or need..." Abby stumbled. "Don't you want to be here when the baby comes?"

"Abby, " Maggie sighed. "You and Luka need this time alone together...to make your own family. It's not like we won't see each other. You're coming to Minnesota in the fall. Luka promised me that." Abby nodded.

"And you don't have to worry, " Maggie said as she put her hands on either side of her daughter's face. "I fully intend to be the very best Grandma this baby could ever have." Maggie giggled happily.

"Can you believe I actually said _Grandma_? I am going to be a grandma?" She grimaced. Abby laughed and hugged her mother close. "Hey Abby," Luka called from the field. "Come here...we need your bat!"

"No..." she groaned reluctantly.

"Come on..." Luka pleaded. "Please? We have a displaced runner for you."

"Designated runner...," she shook her head. "No!" Luka came around the back stop fencing and picked up her hand. He pulled her reluctantly to the other side and Alex handed her a bat. Abby frowned but gave it a practice swing.

"They agreed to this?" she muttered. "Luka, I'm eight months pregnant. What if I get hit by the ball?" Luka grinned.

"They are ahead by 6 runs and it's our last bat, " he said and put a cap on her head. "I think they would agree to anything. It will be fine." Abby looked over the field. Chuny wasbouncing up and down on second base and Neela was poised to run off first. Ray stood confidently with a heel on third base. Abby looked up at Luka.

'Your bases are loaded," she said.

"Uh...yeah," Luka grinned and took her hand. He pulled her to the plate where Malik stood ready to run for her.

"Hit a home run and I'll marry you," Luka whispered in her ear and kissed her cheek. Abby's mouth dropped open. He chortled and backed off to the on deck circle. Abby looked at his grinning face and narrowed her eyes determinedly. She turned to the pitcher and tapped home plate with her bat. She lifted it to her shoulder and waited.

"Strrriiiiiiike one," the umpire called as the ball smacked into the catcher's mitt.

"Come on, Abby, take your time," Malik said quietly. She scuffed her feet in the dirt and raised the bat again. The ball was pitched and this time made contact with the bat. The ER team cheered as it sailed off into left field. Abby stepped back out of the way as Ray stomped on home plate and swung her off her feet in a hug to a safer spot. Chuny skipped over the plate and gave Abby a high five slap. Neela crossed just a few seconds later and came to a screeching halt as she stopped to catch her breath.

"I'm coming in...I'm coming in!" Malik hollered as he slid belly first over the plate.

"Saaaafe!" the umpire hollered as the ball smacked into the catcher's mitt. The runners all cheered and jumped up and down. Abby turned and looked at Luka who was leaning against the high fence on the side. She crossed her arms over her chest and tapped her foot expectantly. Luka grinned and took a moment to shift his baseball jersey on his shoulders and adjust his cap backwards on his head. Abby was suddenly aware of the odd little circle the ER and NICU teams had made behind her at home plate. Maggie was standing at her spot by the bleachers, both hands clasped together and tucked under her chin as she watched the scene played out before her. Abby put her hands on her hips as Luka approached her, his eyes never leaving her face. As he drew nearer, his smile grew.

"I've been set up," Abby said slowly. Luka's grin deepened.

"Uh...yeah..." he said. He took something out of his pocket and then dropped to his knees in dirt in front of her. He lifted one of her hands to his lips and pressed a kiss to her palm.

"Abby," he said softly as he looked up at her. "Danijela was the very first woman that I gave my heart to..." Tears welled up in his eyes.

"And you will be the last," he finished. "I never thought I could be this happy again. Will you please marry me...and be my wife?" He fumbled with a jeweler's box and opened it to reveal a simply cut diamond set in a simple gold band.

"Oh, man..." Abby choked as she looked at the ring for a long moment. "Are you sure?" The circle around her broke into laughter and Luka stood up. He took the ring from the box and slipped it on her finger. Abby looked at it on her hand and then smiled up at him. Luka bent his head to kiss her and wrapped her in a warm embrace.

"Now THAT's my kind of home run," Ray laughed as he high fived a grinning Chuny.


	17. The Waiting Begins

Abby sighed and looked at herself in the bathroom mirror. She groaned inwardly and patted her cheeks a bit.

"I'm fat," she whispered to herself. "I am definitely fat." She dragged the brush through her hair and then shook her head and let her hair fall over her shoulders. She leaned forward and studied her puffy brown eyes. She sighed and turned to see Luka standing at the door. He grinned slightly.

"What?" she asked sharply.

"I was just thinking about how beautiful you are," he shrugged. Abby rolled her eyes.

"Yeah...right," she said. She tried to ease past him and Luka didn't budge. He lifted a strand of her hair and let it slide through his fingers with a smile. His fingers traced a trail down her bare shoulder to her elbow and his blue eyes met her brown ones. He slipped a finger under the strap of her sleeveless pajama top and he raised his eyebrows.

"You can not be serious," she said.

"Why not?" he asked. She spread her hands and looked down at her bare stomach protruding above her pajama pants.

"Duh?"

"It hasn't stopped us before this."

"You have to go to the hospital."

"The hospital can wait." He snickered and tugged at the sleeve strap again.

"Please?" he wheedled. Abby sighed and suppressed a smile. He put his hands on her shoulders, turned her around and pushed her gently toward their rumpled bed. When her knees were pressing the mattress he stopped and wrapped his arms around her. His hands cupped her small, but delightfully fuller, breasts gently and he kissed the crook of her neck. Abby turned in his arms and drew his lips to her's. Luka chuckled and eased her back onto the bed carefully. His hands splayed over her stomach and he grinned as he felt the baby moving.

"Somebody wants to play, " he leered and dropped onto the bed beside her. Abby laughed as the mattress bounced and she wrapped her arms around his neck.

He was gone when Abby woke up later...her first official day of maternity leave. She was not on bed rest but restricted to the apartment. Stupid blood pressure. She puttered around and gathered up laundry. She put some chicken in the crock pot and plugged it in to cook for dinner. She loved the crock pot. It was brainless cooking and even she could do some good stuff with it.

The mail came and brought a large envelope package. She signed for the package and thanked the courier. She smiled when she saw the return address. It was from Susan. She sat on the couch and opened it. She pulled out a single sheet of stationary and read the note.

"Abby," it said. "Remember...this too shall pass." Then she pulled out a very pretty, white cotton nightgown with pearl buttons down the front. She put her hand in again and drew out a slinky black negligee. She burst out laughing. God bless Susan. She knew exactly how bring her out of a funk.

"Abby?" Luka said when she answered the telephone later. "How was your first day of maternity leave?"

"I'm bored," she said. "When are you coming home?"

"I am sorry but I am going to be stuck here for a little longer," Luka said. "No...maybe a lot longer...another whole shift."

"I made dinner..."

"Put the crock pot in the refrigerator and I will eat some when I get home."

"How did you know I used the crock pot?" Lukachuckled on the other end of the line.

"Is it something good?" he asked.

"Uh...yeah," she said.

"You used the crock pot." There was a knock on the door and she pulled herself up from the couch.

"'I gotta go," she said. "Someone is at the door. Call me later?"

"I will," Luka said. Abby went to the door and looked through the security peep hole. Neela and Chuny were waiting outside. Abby opened the door.

"Hi!" she cried happily and let them in.

"Luka is stuck at the hospital and we thought you might be up to some company," Chuny said as she set a covered salad bowl on the table. "We brought movies." Neela handed her a bag and Abby looked at the titles.

"Bend It Like Beckham...a soccer movie?" Neela shrugged.

"The clerk said it was pretty good," she said. "I couldn't find anything acceptable in Ray's collection."

"I probably would have," Chuny raised her hand and laughed. Movies forgotten, they had dinner together and pulled out the Scrabble board. It was an Abby massacre. She forgot to lay down the 'English only' rule...again. Between Neela and Chuny's Spanish she didn't have a chance. She was beginning to hate the game.

When Luka came home at 3 am, he found Abby sound asleep in their bed surrounded by the baby storybooks they had been collecting. She was propped up on a stack of pillows so she could breathe easier. He smiled and stacked the books on the table next to the bed. He undressed and slipped into his pajama pants and crawled under the covers next to her.

"Hi..." she murmured sleepily as he snuggled next to her. She turned on her side and moved over so he could share her pillows. Luka pressed up against her back and rested his hand on her bare belly. He chuckled when he felt the shape of a little foot kicking him. This was heaven to come home to. He sighed and drifted off to sleep.


	18. Still Waiting

"Hi..." Luka called as he entered the door of the apartment and set his brief case on a table near the door. Abby was settled on the couch with her feet propped up on the coffee table in front of her. She was focused intently on the television screen in front of her.

"What are you watching...the food channel?" he asked as he dropped onto the couch next to her.

"Yeah..." Abby mused without looking away from the screen where a perky little chef was preparing a 30 minute meal. "I am trying to decide how I could have gotten this far in life without a good whisk in my kitchen."

"A whisk?"

"Yeah...they all use them," she said as she leaned forward for a kiss. "They _whisk _their eggs. They _whisk _their chocolate. They _whisk_ their oils and spices. I think I need a good whisk."

"But you don't like to cook."

"I am definitely going to try to do it more. I mean, " she gestured seriously to the television. "...it looks way easier than I thought." Luka groaned and chuckled as he put his arm across her shoulders and pulled her back against him.

"You need to be back to work," he said.

"Ya think?" she snorted. "It's barely been a week and I am bored out of my skull."

"Do you want to go for a drive? Maybe stop somewhere for dinner?" Abby sat up and turned to look at him.

"You mean...out in public? Around actual real people?"

"We could even stop and get a ...whisk?" he grinned. Abby kissed him on the cheek.

"Come on..." she demanded. "Help me up. I need to change!"

Chicago was hot and busy...a typical midweek summer evening. But the fresh air from the open windows of the car felt so good. Abby leaned back and enjoyed people watching. Runners, skaters and parents with strollers walked along the sidewalks of the Lake Michigan shoreline.

"Do you feel like a hamburger? Maybe some banana cream pie?" Luka asked her. Abby looked at him.

"Ed DeBevic's okay?" She nodded happily. He drove to the out of the way tourist spot and parked. He helped her out of the car and took her hand. The 50's music was blaring from the juke box as they entered. He spoke to the poodle skirted waitress and they were led to the back dining area, right in the middle of a whole crowd of ER employees.

"Surprise!" they all shouted and Luka led her to a table in the middle of everything. Haleh stood up and hugged her.

"Aww...we miss you so much, girl!" she said.

"I'll say!" Clemente lifted a beer bottle in tribute. "Even bitchy Abby is better than no Abby." Dori hit him in the face with a thrown wadded napkin.

"What!" he frowned playfully. "She knows how much...fun...she was!" Abby shook her head as everyone laughed. People came and went through the evening as shifts at the hospital changed. It was sheer heaven to be catching up and chatting and sharing. There were gifts to open and an unlimited supply of banana cream pie that lasted well into the night.

Abby was quiet on the drive home. They carried the bags of gifts into the nursery and Luka studied her thoughtfully as they got ready for bed.

"Did you have fun tonight?" he asked her as he helped her into her favorite pajama pants and tee shirt. Abby nodded.

"Is everything okay?" She nodded again and then sighed.

"All this extra time you have been spending at the hospital has been to help...Sam...out?" Abby said finally. Luka looked at her.

"What else would you have me do?" he said. "She is the nurse manager, Abby."

" And she is skinny...and blonde...and you were still living with her barely a month before all this happened." She stopped shortly and sighed heavily. She dropped awkwardly onto the bed and folded her hands protectively over her stomach.

"We were having trouble for a long time," he replied quietly. 'You know that." She shrugged.

"Why is it that the entire rest of the world can see how I feel about you, but you can't?" Luka groaned. "What else can I say to you?" Abby lifted her eyes to his face.

"Nothing," she said quietly. "These are my demons and I have to deal with them." Luka shook his head and sat next to her. He picked up her hand and fingered the diamond ring on her left hand.

"You have this," he said quietly. He placed her hand on his chest over his heart. "And you have this." He kissed her softly.

"There are no...demons...to deal with." Abby nodded slowly and then struggled to get up from the bed again. Luka stood up and helped her. She was silent as she headed for the bathroom door. He watched the door shut and then dropped back on the bed. He feigned sleep when she came out of the bathroom. In the last moment before she turned out the bed side lamp he saw that she had been crying.

She was still subdued in the morning. He drove her to Coburn's downtown office for an early appointment and went into the exam room with her.

"Your blood pressure is a whole lot better," Dr. Coburn said approvingly as she looked over the stats a nurse had written for her. "Have you been getting lots of rest?" Abby nodded. Luka helped her lean back on the exam table and Dr. Coburn lifted the loose maternity top to exam her belly.

"The baby has turned," she said. "It's no longer in a breech postion."

"Breech?" Luka choked.

"It's fine, Dr. Kovac," Dr. Coburn said reassuringly. She pulled the top down and helped Abby sit up again.

"I think we need to get a delivery plan in place now," she said. "We'll get the papers filled out to preregister you at the hospital." Abby nodded.

"Have you given any thought to what we talked about last time? Epidural? Umm..."

"Yes," Abby interrupted. "I don't want anything."

"Wha...what?" Luka said. She looked at him.

" I can do this," Abby said firmly. Dr. Coburn's eyes went from one face to the other and she suppressed a smile.

"There no shame in an epi, Abby," she said. "Especially with a first baby."

"I can do this," Abby repeated determindedly and tossed her hands in the air.

"But we haven't done any classes...or anything..." Luka's voice trailed off. Abby looked at him. The color had drained from his face.

"I did this in OB for years," she said firmly. "I'll walk you through it. I don't want anything."

"Well, you sound pretty determined," Dr. Coburn said with a smile. "It doesn't have to be iron clad. You can always make a different decision later." She stood up and patted Abby's knee.

"Good for you," she winked. "I'll get that paperwork so you can fill it out and then set up an appointment for next week. But between you and I... I don't think that you will really be needing it." She smiled and was gone. Luka sat down on the stool and looked at her. Abby scoffed.

"'What is wrong with you?" she asked. Luka shook his head but he never took his eyes off her face.

"Luka, you are a doctor," she said. "You've delivered babies before."

"Yeah..." he said. "But that was for patients not...you." His hands were shaking as he reached to take one of her's in his grasp.

"You're so...petite," he said. "This could be bad." Abby shook her head.

"I am not having a huge baby," she said. "It'll be fine." He swallowed and she chuckled.

"It'll be fine," she said again. She smiled and drew his face close for a kiss. Luka sighed and hugged her.


	19. Happy Birth Day!

"Hey..." Luka said as he came out of the bedroom and saw her bundled up in a shawl on the couch. "How long have you been up?" Abby shrugged and flipped the channels on the television.

"Couldn't sleep," she said and settled back with her feet propped on the coffee table. She pulled the shawl closer around her and zoned in on the television tuned to a news program.

"I have an early meeting this morning so I am going to grab something on the way to the hospital for breakfast," he said as he pressed a kiss to her forehead. "Want to meet me later for lunch?" She nodded.

"I might do that," she said without looking at him. Luka frowned a little in confusion and watched her for a long moment before leaving the apartment. When he was gone, Abby let out a long breath and then pulled a stopwatch from under the shawl. She looked at it and grimaced slightly.

"'Fifteen minutes...again?" she sighed wearily.

It was much later in the day when Abby paid the cab driver and carried her bag into the ambulance bay doors.

"Jerry," she asked as she dropped the bag on the floor and leaned on the counter. "Do you have any idea where Luka is?" Luka came out of an exam room and saw her. He smiled.

"Hi," he said as he slipped the patient chart back into the file on the counter. "You're a little late for lunch but I think I can leave for a few minutes now." Abby sighed.

"We're having a baby," she said.

"I know..." Luka said with a smile.

"No...Luka...we're having a baby...now," she said. "I have been in labor since 4:30 this morning." Luka's smile faded as looked at her and then down at his watch. He looked up at her again.

"Nine hours?" he said. "Why didn't you tell me? I'll call Coburn."

"I already did," she said. "They're expecting us upstairs. I wasn't sure if it was the real thing but...oh boy...I am sure now!" She clenched her fists and drew in a deep breath. Luka grabbed her forearms across the counter and slowly counted with her until she let out her breath.

"Oh damn..." she whispered. 'My water just broke." Luka grabbed a wheel chair from the end of the counter and wheeled it around to her. He helped her into the chair and then picked up her bag.

'Jerry..." he said.

"I know, I know," the desk clerk said as he held up the phone. "Call Dr. Weaver. I'm on it." Luka nodded and headed quickly toward the elevator with the wheelchair.

"How far apart are they?" He asked as the elevator doors closed.

"About 6 minutes now, I think," Abby said. "Sometimes closer, sometimes 7 minutes apart. It's been like that for about an hour and a half. Coburn thought I should come in to be on the safe side. I thought I could get you through the entire shift before you had to leave though."

"You should have called me," Luka massaged her shoulder gently.

"I didn't want you hovering over me, Luka," she said. "I can't stand it when you hover."

The elevator doors opened and Luka pushed the chair onto the OB/GYN floor. Luka wheeled her quickly to the nursing station and spoke to a nurse. They were ushered into a nearby birthing room and Luka helped her onto the bed. He removed her sodden maternity jeans and tee shirt and handed her the hospital gown. Abby put a second gown over her shoulders like a jacket. Luka slipped her bare feet into some slippers she'd brought from home. They looked up as Dr. Coburn and a young, freckled faced nurse came in. The girl was pushing a small equipment cart.

"Abby, this is Marcie," Janet Coburn said. "She is your labor and delivery nurse." She leaned toward the girl slightly. "Learn from her," she instructed. "Abby was one of our best OB nurses till the ER stole her away. Now she walks on the wild side down there as a doctor." Marcie nodded enthusiastically.

"So...how many times have you done this?" Abby asked. Marcie looked uncertainly at Dr. Coburn and then smiled brightly.

"You're the first!" she said. Abby looked at Luka and sighed.

"We had to be at a teaching hospital?" she whispered. He chuckled and kissed her nose.

"Okay, Luka," Janet Coburn said briskly. "Out...while we get her set up here. I need to examine her."

"But I can stay. I'm a doctor," he protested.

"Maybe so," she said firmly. ""but you are a _dad_ in here and dads need to take a break...right now." Luka frowned and cast a glance toward a very amused Abby.

"I'll be right outside," he said as he bumped into the door not wanting to take his eyes off her. Abby nodded and turned her attention to her doctor.

Luka leaned against the wall next to the birthing room door and checked his watch. He dropped his hands and tapped the wall impatiently. He sighed and watched the workings of the nurse's station in front of him. He nodded and smiled as people spoke to him. His mind was racing. He should go back to the ER to seewhen Kerrywould arrive. But he didn't want to leave Abby. He looked at his watch again. It seemed like an eternity before Marcie came to the door for him. Luka went to the bed where Abby was watching as Dr. Coburn fastened a fetal monitor band around her belly. She looked up and took his hand in her's. She squeezed it tightly and tried to smile. It was just a moment before the sound of the baby's heart beat could be heard beating steadily. Luka grinned.

'We're not as far along as we thought we were but almost there," Dr. Coburn said. "The baby is in a good position so we're going to wait a bit for her IV. It will help a lot if she is on her feet. Go for a couple of walks...you know the drill. We will let gravity do some of the work here. Are you still planning on trying this without any pain medications?" Abby nodded. Dr. Coburn shrugged in approval.

"Okay then. I'll check on you in a little while," she said and smiled as Marcie pushed the cart from the room. Abby was finally alone with Luka. They looked at one another and started to giggle.

"This is so crazy..." she sighed. "Can you believe it's really happening?" He reached over to her and held her close.

"Wanna go for a walk?" he asked. She nodded and looked at the cordless fetal monitor for a second.

"In a minute..." she said. Luka put his hand protectively on her belly and felt it grow into a hard, tight knot. Abby held her breath and gazed intently at him as he held her hands and counted for her. She let out a deep breath when the contraction was over. He took her by the elbow and helped her off the bed and slowly across the room to the door. He opened the door and they looked out into the busy corridor. Abby looked up at him and grimaced. He shook his head.

"Let's stay in here," he said. "We'll dance."

"You don't dance."

"You didn't complain on New Year's Eve."

"That was dancing?"

Luka frowned playfully and Abby looked around for a radio or cd player.

"I didn't bring any music."

Luka reached to pick up the phone and called the ER. He spoke quietly to Jerry. It was just a few minutes later that Chuny appeared with the radio they kept at the admit desk. She was grinning as she plugged the machine into the wall.

"All set," she said. "You two have the entire ER all in a dither. And everyone is upset because I won the draw to bring this up to you!" She kissed Abby's cheek and hugged Luka.

"Oh...and heads up on this one," she smiled. 'If this baby is born after midnight, Morris wins the baby pool...so step it up a notch, okay? He will never let us live it down." Luka laughed.

"Good luck!" she said and left them alone. Luka turned to the radio setting and fiddled with the knobs until he got a music station. He turned to her and bowed low in a courtly manner. Abby laughed and slipped her arms around his neck and pressed herself close to his chest. Luka wrapped his arms around her and held her. He closed his eyes and reveled in the feel of her warmth and softness...and their child in between them.

The relative peace of just being together lasted only an hour. Then the world closed in as the baby made way into their lives. The transitioning phase had been difficult for her. She had horrible back labor as well. It nearly killed him whenever she cried...but she still insisted on no pain medication. Luka was sweating as he talked her through each contraction and helped her focus on the task at hand...which meant not pushing. It was a relief to them both when she finally could.

"I don't think I can do this," Abby whimpered as she fell back against Luka's arms. "I'm too tired."

"Come on, Abby," Dr. Coburn said. "One more good push and we'll have the head."

"It's already crowning, Abby," Luka said as he tightened his grasp on her shoulders. "We're almost there. What did you say you were going to do? Pump it out?" Abby squeezed her eyes shut and tried not to laugh.

"Don't do this now, Luka...please?" she groaned with a laugh.

"It's almost over," he said softly in her ear and braced her as she sat up again and pushed. He grimaced in pain as she squeezed his hand with all her might.

"Okay...we've got the head," Dr. Coburn turned a wrinkled face in her hands and quickly suctioned out the baby's mouth and nose. Luka looked down and started to cry.

"Oh, it's got my hair!" he exclaimed and kissed Abby's hand, not taking his eyes off his child.

"What is it?" Abby asked as she panted and began to push again.

"I don't know yet," he cried...and suddenly a slippery little body was in Dr. Coburn's hands. She turned the baby over and laid her on Abby's stomach.

"It's a girl," Luka choked. He buried his face against her forehead and sobbed. "It's a girl..." Abby lifted her hand to the back of his head and reached the other down to her daughter's damp hair trying to see her. She sighed and laughed as the baby wailed. Tears rolled down her face.

"Come on, Dr. Kovac," Dr. Coburn said brightly. "Pull yourself together. Someone has to cut the cord." Luka straightened, blinked his eyes and kissed Abby's cheek. He laughed as he took in the baby's wrinkled little body. He took the surgical scissors from Dr. Coburn and cut carefully through the cord that bound his daughter to her mother. Then he took the blanket that was offered to him and wrapped the baby up gently. He lifted her and placed her in Abby's arms.

"Oh...hi, sweetheart," Abby sighed as she sniffed and kissed the baby's head. Luka chuckled and wiped the tears off her cheeks.

"I love you," he said suddenly. 'I love you so much." Luka was overwhelmed and stunned with the power of the statement he had just made. It felt so unfamiliar. Had he never said it to her before? Abby looked up at him, stunned for a moment, and nodded.

"I know..." she said tearfully. "Me too."

Luka's lips quivered and he encircled his family carefully into an embrace and held them close.

Later, Abby opened her eyes slowly and blinked trying to remember where she was. She stretched a bit and the events of the night before came flooding back. She had been so tired and so wired at the same time. When had she fallen asleep? Her eyes rested on Luka in the recliner next to her bed. He was holding the baby in his arms. He smiled at her.

"Hi," he whispered. Abby smiled softly.

"Have you put her down at all?" she asked. Luka shook his head and peeked down at his daughter's sleeping face.

"You are so going to spoil her, " Abby warned.

"Yeah..." Luka drawled with a grin. Abby noticed the splint on his little finger.

"What happened to your finger?" she asked.

"Ah...it's...uh...broken," he grinned sheepishly.

"Did I do that?" Her eyes widened and then she tried to suppress a laugh. "I'm so sorry." Luka smiled and shrugged. He shifted in the recliner.

"I have been waiting for you so we can check her out again together," he said.

Abby pushed the buttons to raise the head of her bed higher and Luka stood up. He placed the snugly wrapped bundle in her arms and Abby caught her breath as she searched the serene sleeping face of her just hours old daughter. Luka pressed a kiss to her forehead.

"She is so beautiful," Abby sighed. "Look at her hair." Abby brushed a finger across her daughter's brow and fingered the already long, feathery dark hair that covered her head. She carefully began to loosen the blanket and the baby frowned at the disturbance. She wasn't happy about losing the security of that tight blanket so she crammed her fists under her chin and drew her tiny knees up into a ball. Luka chuckled and gently rubbed one of her minuscule feet.

"Six pounds even...ten fingers...ten toes..." he said softly. "You do good work."

"We...do good work," Abby said and threaded the fingers of one of her hands through his.

"Thank you, Luka," she said, not taking her eyes off the baby.

"For what?" he asked softly.

"For helping me do this," she sighed. "I didn't really know how much I wanted this...us...until right this minute." She looked up at him and he kissed her gently. He grinned and rubbed his nose against her's. It was at that moment that Lauren Abigail Kovac decided to grab some of that attention for herself. She was hungry after all. She stretched and let out a wail to let her doting parents know exactly who was the boss in the family.


	20. Going Home

"Oh, they're here!" Chuny called happily as the elevator doors opened and Luka pushed a wheelchair onto the ER floor. Abby grinned as Chuny was the first to her side. She folded back the blanket that covered the baby's face and Chuny sighed.

"Oh, Abby," Chuny sighed. "She's beautiful."

"Hey, let me take a look at that million dollar baby!" Malik grinned as he stepped closer. "'Got me a wad for my bank account with that baby pool money!"

"Yeah, yeah...don't rub it in," Morris scolded. 'Not cool because you only won by 49 measely minutes." He looked at Abby.

"You couldn't hold it off for fifty minutes? Fifty little ones?"

"Sorry, Morris," Luka said. "We tried." Abby grinned up at Luka.

Neela stood back but did not stop smiling. She'd gotten her turn to actually hold Lauren upstairs before reporting to work. Ray grinned and looped an arm across Neela's shoulders. Frank peeked over Abby's shoulder.

"Aw..." he said. Everyone looked at him and waited. Frank looked around.

"What?" he said. "I don't have anything to say."

"Well, that's a first," Haleh frowned and carefully lifted Lauren from Abby's arms.

"Now, you are going to call me if you need a babysitter, right?" she said.

"I promised," Abby said. Haleh smiled and placed the baby back in Abby's arms.

"She is so beautiful," Haleh sighed. "So very special." Luka grinned and pressed a hand to Abby's shoulder.

"Well, if you good people will excuse me," he said. 'I am going to take my family home." They all laughed and there was a round of applause as Luka pushed the wheelchair out to the ambulance bay where his car was waiting. One by one the crowd began to disperse as they watched them go and then went back to work in the ER.


	21. Implosion an epilogue

_**Writing has always been something that I have done for my enjoyment alone. This fan fiction has given me the audience I never anticipated having. Thank you so much to those of you who have read this story...and taken the time to review. Many, many thanks to those of you with whom I have established an on line friendship. I have enjoyed this experience tremendously. I have definitely enjoyed getting 'inside the heads' of my favorite ER characters. But, I think it's time to put this particular story to rest. Once again...thank you very much! **_

It was a planned implosion...designed to bring the debris inward from the explosives. The city dignataries had finished their speeches and some were already gone. Everyone was rejoicing in the decision to rebuild a state of the art Emergency Care Center at County. Now everyone was just waiting for the process to begin.

Abby stood in the cordoned off 'safe area' with the other ER employees, past and present. There were a lot of them there. She glanced around and smiled a little. There had been a lot of reconnections made during the celebrations of the past few days. Carol and Doug Ross had flown in from Seattle and were chatting animatedly with Luka behind her. Their family was staying with them for the weekend. It was a bit crowded with all four children in their apartment but no one minded. A hotel seemed out of the question for some reason. Three year old Lauren was adoring all the attention she was getting from 12 year old Kate and Tess...and even Mark Ross, who called her a 'royal pain' from his lofty "7.5 year old" status. Abby did not doubt that her daughter would win him over...maybe even by the time Luka and Doug took them all to the Shedd Aquarium after the ceremony. Luka was a little dismayed at his daughter's uncanny ability to bat her long, dark lashes and charm the opposite sex so easily. Abby just didn't have the heart to tell him that their daughter was learning that particular skill at **his **knee.

Neela stood off in a corner chatting with Peter and Cleo Benton... about surgery no doubt. Pratt, Ray and Morris huddled together in the seasonably spring cold. Malik, Yosh, Haleh, Lily, Chuny, Dori, Lydia, Inez...they were all there, standing together, arms linked. They were having their own celebration of sorts later as well. Abby and Carol had been invited. Rachel Green was laughing at something Jerry was saying to her. She was so grown up and gorgeous. Mark would have been proud of her. She'd taken the day off from her classes at Loyola University to be there. Dr. Anspaugh mingled with them all, his hand clasped tightly in Jeanne Boulet's.

Abby noticed a small television screen off to the side with the implosion engineers. Someone was walking through the emptied ER checking the explosives with a video camera. She moved to get a better view and watched. Good old exam room 3 was where the implosion would begin. How fitting. Abby took a deep breath as she followed the camera through it's final tour. So many people were not here but she could see them in the camera's eye. Once he'd been assured that the Joshua Carter Center would be untouched in the renovations, John had decided to stay in Paris. Abby understood. Kem wasn't comfortable in Chicago anyway. Dr. Corday hadn't even answered her invitation. Dr. Chen was in Taiwan. Susan wasn't there either.

"I made my peace with County years ago, Abby," she'd said on the phone. "I think I just want to leave the past in the past."

They were all moving on, some to new positions in the hospital. It would be several years before the new ER was ready for patients...or employees. Luka was staying on staff. Kerry wanted him ready to take over again when the new ECC was operational. He was excited about being involved in the renovations. He was already writing grants for the most state of the art equipment he could get his hands on. Abby was going back to her roots in OB and joining Dr. Coburn's practice. She would be handling office visits and was looking forward to the regular hours for a while. But she knew she would eventually end up back at County. The ER was where her heart was.

She sighed as she watched the camera sweep through the trauma rooms following the laid guide wires. In her mind she saw Mark Green, Dr. Romano...Dave Malucci...Lucy Knight...Sandy Lopez...E-Ray...Frank at the admit desk...Nate...they were all still there...along with the endless parade of patients.

"What are you thinking?" Kerry asked as she moved to stand with Abby and watched the screen with her. Abby looked at her and smiled as she shrugged.

"We're ready, Dr. Weaver," an engineer said as he handed her a small box with a joy stick trigger. Kerry glanced at Abby.

"Wanna help?" she asked. Abby shook her head and leaned back against Luka, who wrapped his arms around her snugly. He rested his chin on the same hard hat they all wore and held her close. Kerry's eyes swept over her staff...her friends...and she held up the box.

"Here's to the future!" she said and flipped the switch.

The End


End file.
